My Bitter Coffee Is The Newest Challenger

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Teen Poetry #7

My Bitter Coffee Is The Newest Challenger

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

0 posted 2005-09-07 04:50 PM

do you see it?
there.
the word has been found
at last.
at long last.
long lasting?
anyway, that beautiful piece of
sugar
on the tongue.
it is vital as glucose and
harmful as
sweet n' low.
see it?
feel it?
hope.
that is the word, the sight, the
best prayer.
but most of the time it really is
sweet n' low.

CrAzI_bAbI_cHiKa
Member

since 2003-07-16

Posts 248

1 posted 2005-09-11 07:37 PM

I can never tell if you think that much more deeply than I do, or if everything you write is just the musings of a psychotic mind. Everything that I read by you takes me three times just to absorb, and then I sit here and wonder if you write just to confuse me. Have to say, your poem is, as always, at the very least, captivating, if not fascinating. You truly amaze/confuse me, and that usually takes a lot.

Well done.
<3 keryn

You know? I thought you were smart...But you cant see what is directly in front of your face...

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

2 posted 2005-09-13 01:52 AM

haha...i'm really not psychotic. and i doubt that i am smarter than you. thanks for reading though. i'm glad my stuff draws such interest.

StarryEyed3
Member

since 2005-06-26

Posts 58
bostonia

3 posted 2005-09-15 11:10 PM

i agree with keryn... there is something so magnetic about the way you twist and play with words. very thought-provoking and confusing, haha. anyway, fantastic.

"and i'll sit and wonder of every love that could have been
if i'd only thought of something charming to say..." -death cab

Lexy
Senior Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 1038
California

4 posted 2005-09-15 11:51 PM

sugar
on the tongue.
it is vital as glucose and
harmful as
sweet n' low.

I love these lines.
so well done.
I applaud.

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

5 posted 2005-09-27 12:11 PM

thank you all. i really appreciate the feedback.

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