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Teen Poetry #7
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Lisa_bebe15
Member
since 2001-11-15
Posts 151
Florida

0 posted 2004-12-01 09:41 AM


I close my eyes,
I can feel the cool breeze hitting my face,
The smell of fall surrounds me.
Seeing the leaves,
Colors every where I turn,
Bursting out of every leaf.
Hearing your sweet voice.
It brings me all back.
Back to when I was with you.
Only a month ago we were walking through the halls hand in hand,
Its was like being in a forin place,
Not knowing where I was going.
Im not in my territory anymore, only yours.
But still feeling so safe with you leading the way.
Laying on the cold grass with you,
I can still feel you holding me so tight.
Your warmth warming me.
But than a warm breeze brings me back,
And a tear rolls down my face.
Thats when I realize,
I'm home.

© Copyright 2004 Lisa Ann - All Rights Reserved
*Alli4000*
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188
The World of Poetry
1 posted 2004-12-01 06:34 PM


Wow, Lisa...good write.
One thing though: "Its was like being in a forin place". Did you mean, "It was like being in a foreign place"?
Just wondering, sorry if I'm wrong.
Other than that, great write. Keep Posting!

~Alli~

*:.AIM = Alli4000.:*
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened...

Savage Quiescence
Member
since 2002-07-29
Posts 326
Wandering
2 posted 2004-12-12 06:46 PM


This write hit home for me. It is amazing how quickly things can change. I enjoyed this piece. There were a few errors, but I think they were just typos. Thank you for sharing.
broken627
Member
since 2003-11-26
Posts 66
Eugene Oregon
3 posted 2004-12-13 01:01 AM


I can really relate to you... This poem was really good...if you have time you should check some of my poems out<3 later~!
-*-There’s still a little bit of your song in my ear
There’s still a little bit of your words I long to hear
You step a little closer to me
So close that I can't see what's going on-*-
~Cannonball by Damien Rice-*-

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