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Teen Poetry #7
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ShadyMakaveli
Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 128


0 posted 2004-11-13 12:57 PM


Blue Sky

A once Blue Sky
Shines sun no more
Clouds have gathered
While innocence descends
The power of thunder
Gives beginning an end...

Disappointment.

The storm has begun
Consequences follow
Devastating earthquakes
Demolish what was built
Memories buried in rubble
Overcome with guilt...

Destruction.

In a sea of emotions
Heavy waves crash down
Questions with no answers
Words of empty explanations
Fall upon deaf ears
Taking blame with frustration...

Despair.

With a few spoken words
Unable to express emotions
Life no longer makes sense
Memories of a distant past
The world has been shattered
Never expected this to last...

Divorce.

Never forget the once Blue Sky...


Slight changes...but want to know what people think of the changes...thanx in advance...

© Copyright 2004 ShadyMakaveli - All Rights Reserved
I_dont_know_me
Junior Member
since 2003-12-08
Posts 48
UK, Cymru
1 posted 2004-11-13 04:58 AM


wow, what a great poem i especially liked

"In a sea of emotions
Heavy waves crash down
Questions with no answers
Words of empty explanations
Fall upon deaf ears
Taking blame with frustration..."

great write
x emma x

~DreamChild~
Senior Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 544
in your dreams
2 posted 2004-11-16 06:00 PM


bump...
back to the top!

{this poem was sturated with pain , and sorrow, such heartfelt emotion!}


~DreamChild's~
poem of the week!    

lol  



           ~Express Yourself~
          

punkrockerrobin
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180
Sparks, NV
3 posted 2004-11-16 08:48 PM


great stuff i liked it. keep on sharin.
robin

hi my name is robin and i am addicted to poetry and matt!
"and we'll all float on ok....." - modest mouse
aim - reklesabandnrckr

ShadyMakaveli
Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 128

4 posted 2004-11-23 02:13 AM


Thank you all for your responses...It is really appreciated...
*Alli4000*
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188
The World of Poetry
5 posted 2004-11-23 04:19 PM


Just like I said about the orginal version...amazing.

~Alli~

*:.AIM = Alli4000.:*   My Journal
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened...

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