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Teen Poetry #7
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ShadyMakaveli
Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 128


0 posted 2004-11-10 09:41 PM


Blue Sky

A once Blue Sky
Shines sun no more
Clouds have gathered
While innocence descends
The power of thunder
Gives beginning an end...

Disappointment.

The storm has begun
Consequences follow
Devastating earthquakes
Demolish what was built
Memories buried in rubble
Overcome with guilt...

Destruction.

In a sea of emotions
Waves come crashing down
Questions with no answers
Parents try hard to explain
The words fall on deaf ears
In pain children accept blame...

Despair.

With a few spoken words
Emotions can't be expressed
Life no longer makes sense
Memories of a distant past
The world has been shattered
Never expected this to last...

Divorce.

Never forget the once Blue Sky...


[This message has been edited by ShadyMakaveli (11-11-2004 04:09 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 ShadyMakaveli - All Rights Reserved
WinterWren
Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044
...Coming to
1 posted 2004-11-10 10:13 PM


Woah, that is such a powerful piece. Im speechless. Very different way to describe divorce, the imagery and emotion was excellent.
I love the line, "The power of thunder Gives beginning an end"
Nice to see more farmiliar faces around here. And I hope if this is from personal experience your pain eases soon.

But Im comforted
by the fact that I can hurt inside
all I want to
without anyone ever knowing
~WinterWren~

aussie teen
Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 396
Australia
2 posted 2004-11-11 06:42 AM


this is beautifully sad..... well done... i cant say i know what your going thru but this gives me a new meaning on what its like to have paprnets go thru something like this..... well done shady....
keep ones like this coming.
Ruth

live life as if your going to die tomorow....... but love as if your going to live forever......

*Alli4000*
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188
The World of Poetry
3 posted 2004-11-11 08:04 PM


Disappointment, destruction, despair, and divorce...four things i would hate to go through.
A great write, even though it's so sad.

~Alli~

*:.AIM = Alli4000.:*   My Journal
Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened...

earthdust
Member
since 2003-10-28
Posts 53
predestined and foreknown
4 posted 2004-11-11 11:55 PM


Awww Man...
I was enjoying the poem at first, and when i neared the end ...DIVORCE...
boom, like an emotional speed bump.
but thats good, i really felt the feelings you were trying to express. which is why we share our poetry: to share our feelings. I found this poem to be a very worthy read, because to make someone feel the way you do is quite an accomplishment, and quite a task too!

TY!

ShadyMakaveli
Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 128

5 posted 2004-11-12 01:41 AM


Thank you all for your responses...Most appreciated...and I'm glad my poem was able to achieve the ability to create emotions within you as you read it. Thanks once again...and if anyone else has a response...I look forward to hearing it...
~DreamChild~
Senior Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 544
in your dreams
6 posted 2004-11-13 08:40 PM


hey man i really like this sh....

           ~Express Yourself~
          

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