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Teen Poetry #7
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thinktwice
Member
since 2003-12-23
Posts 125
United States

0 posted 2004-07-26 08:56 PM




Who’s that under there?
With all the pictures you took
The time that you took
Why do you look around?
For the      that just left
The life that you left
When will you give up?
The       that you take
The trip that you    
Who is left for you now?
With the time that has gone
When the lies have all gone

Determined but erased
By the fortune you told
The hands that you fold…
Determined but you taste
As the letter you closed
And the stories you told…
Determined yet ashamed
By words that you lost
Your deviance that caused...
Another to fall


© Copyright 2004 Adam Wolf - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2004-07-26 10:44 PM


I thought the poem was alright. I think you can work on this a little more, but it still have a lot of potential!

I left my wallet in El Segundo...
And I gotta get it
I got got to get it!

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