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Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

0 posted 2004-07-20 07:27 PM

She doesn’t mean to hurt you
living in the impression
that her words don’t affect
anyone else, just her.
She can hear it in your voice
see it in the reflection
of light in your eyes
don’t tell her it doesn’t matter
she’s drowning in her head
tears smearing on your fingerprints
wipe away misery with your fingertips
she can’t stand the thought
that she might be hurting you
murmurs promises you won’t hear
too concerned with making it stop
to realize that you were never the problem,
she can’t look to you forever,
you can’t solve all of her problems,
at least
not if she won’t let you,
if she’s wrong, and you leave.

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

1 posted 2004-07-20 10:59 PM

i liked this. it was not too great at the start but these lines made up for it.

tears smearing on your fingerprints
wipe away misery with your fingertips

well done.

Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

2 posted 2004-07-25 08:07 PM

Compliments from you mean more than compliments from the same people who proclaim everything to be greatness, so I was really glad that my one reply was from you.

Those are my favorite lines.

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

3 posted 2004-07-25 11:26 PM

THIS WAS GREATNESS!!!!!!!! lol

anyway allysa- SUP!

maybe you remember me, maybe you don't...but I am the all mighty moderator... so be careful what you say! I will delete your posts! haha jk

Ok so the poem- woah, I remember a lot of your other poems, not specifically, but the style...and you've definitely improved.
I enjoyed this one a lot and hope to read more.

The teen forum needs to get kicked back into shape- im hoping to do just that

I left my wallet in El Segundo...
And I gotta get it
I got got to get it!

Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

4 posted 2004-08-01 09:51 PM

DOPEY!

I've missed you, my friend. I'm glad you liked this, I wrote this after one of those "we should break up before I hurt you" conversations with my boyfriend (who does not seem to agree with the above statement).

Do you have AIM?

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