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Teen Poetry #7
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I love you
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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I love you |
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Lindsay Member
since 2003-03-26
Posts 59South Dakota |
We live so many miles apart Yet we still remain close in heart And even though it’s been awhile since I’ve seen your face I still remember your smile, and how your kisses taste Do you remember that night at the dance? Where we met, completely by chance It still seems like a dream, to good to be true I’m so lucky to have found a guy such as you And then there was “The Weekend” All day with you I could spend Yet, unfortunately, it all ended to fast The day was bittersweet, I wish forever it could have last But we will always have late night talks on the internet Many hours getting to know each other we have spent So when I say this I know it’s true I love you |
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| © Copyright 2004 Lindsay Strube - All Rights Reserved | |||
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tapper798 Member
since 2003-07-20
Posts 353My own world |
I liked it and I felt I could relate to it. I think that one thing is that the rhyming sounded alittle forced and sometimes you had to make the lines longer to make sure they could rhyme. I did this once and somone on here told me to write out my feelings before hand which helped somewhat, maybe you could try that. I still liked it and thought it was a good poem! Love is giving him the ability to break your heart...but trusting him enough to know he won't. |
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Stepharoo Member
since 2004-05-04
Posts 149Washington, USA |
Very Good! I like it so much...but I have to agree with tapper just a lil... it did seem forced in some spots but all around good! Keep it up. |
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fearing-laughter Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605land of cheese (Wisconsin) |
cool =) gl with the relationship "Be who you want and do what you will, in the end those who matter won't mind, and those who mind won't matter." -Dr Suess- (a brilliant man) |
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