Glowsticks that you hold ( sticks you were told)

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Teen Poetry #7

Glowsticks that you hold ( sticks you were told)

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

0 posted 2004-04-14 05:32 PM

Glowsticks that you hold (deathsticks you were told)

personify yourself as one with 30 lives to live
(too bad you never chose love to give)
classify youself as one too high to touch
(too bad your height holds you from so much)

indigo and scarlet knees held together by the breeze
(so sad you never took the time to watch the leaves)
shakingly steady hands pinch your favorite brand
(so sad you'll smoke yourself to the mother land)

brilliant nights made us turn off the lights
(your pinpoint glowed from a corner on the right)
never again will those thin wifts of sin smolder
(your eyes have darkened, you no longer fear getting older)
from deep inside the winter earth you mistakenly hide
(we knew long before that this deth of light was no lie)
join the raves that make oceanic goodbye waves
(we knew those habits would be you goodnight grave)

[This message has been edited by young_blood (04-15-2004 10:11 PM).]

kissa~rachelle
Senior Member

since 2003-11-27

Posts 988
nowhere special

1 posted 2004-04-14 07:28 PM

wow, sorta makes me think twice about pickin up another cig.! Amazing write chica.

I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

2 posted 2004-04-14 07:43 PM

thank you for the compliment. smoking's baaaaaadddd....also i am a 17 year old male. haha, i will forgive you though.

Deep_Inside
Member

since 2002-02-14

Posts 377
i can't stop hiding

3 posted 2004-04-15 03:10 AM

it seemed like you described my life about 3 years ago... i really like this but a few spelling slips made it a rougher read than it all ready was...keep writing

when you live you begin to die
when you die memories of you life lives in others
when memories of you begin to fade
you truly begin to die

Lexy
Senior Member

since 2003-01-28

Posts 1038
California

4 posted 2004-04-15 09:37 PM

strong and original. the spelling errors do make it rough to read. but, this is amazing. theres a mysterious feel to it.

young_blood
Senior Member

since 2003-09-19

Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

5 posted 2004-04-15 10:16 PM

thank you both. i took care of the spelling errors. once again thank you for reading

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