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Teen Poetry #7

i will

Riley

Senior Member

since 2002-07-18

Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

0 posted 2004-03-02 07:54 PM

take my hand
hold me close
dance away till eternity
      e
    n
        t
     e
         r
a world
black

                      skies

hot nights
nothing to hold us back
watch my

e
   y
e
   s

c
o
n
n
e
c
t
just wait a
                 minute
because its to
    s
     o
      o
       n
time is the best medicine
just wait
i'll
              catch up
just hold on
i'll
                         be there soon.

i'm sitting in the dark....waiting...
waiting for you to see me.

muchos
Member

since 2003-11-29

Posts 102

1 posted 2004-03-02 09:01 PM

this is a good one...its different. and i definately appreciate that. i am getting sick of the rhyming poems in here, and there seems to be a lot. i encourage you to expand on these ideas and your layout is incredible. its totally unique. the only thing i have to say is try to work on vocab. expand a little and create a more colorful world for your reader. they will appreciate it, and so will you. i liked this write, keep it up

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