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Teen Poetry #7
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young_blood
Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN

0 posted 2004-03-01 04:01 PM


here's a song of mine.....it's new. ijust wrote it. like a minute ago

Freezing Point of The Heart (Cracked and Calved)

Blue-black windows shade the light in your heart (shade the heat)
And it’s hard to let light in when locks talk back to me.
The sub-zero temperature outside what we can mentally see
Keeps the pain dulled enough to hide the scars. (Hide the heat)

Long way to tomorrow from my backyard’s fate
But we’ll keep our cards from well-dealt hands.
So break bonds that are loose from late payments
And forget the notion we ever had set these plans.

Emotion is tyranny when the heart boils black tar (summer asphalt)
And the caldron bubbles over and spills into my lap again.
You won’t ever let me escape from the way you spell end,
Four letters that all match my name written in the sky. (Penned in darkness)

Long way to tomorrow from my backyard’s fate
But we’ll keep our cards from well-dealt hands.
So break bonds that are loose from late payments
And forget the notion we ever had set these plans

So many nights to find the invisible path to the Final Kiss Galaxy (last night inside)
And we memorized the names of old sad stars in the sky.
Let’s find our own ways to the moon and wonder silently “why?”
But we both know that fate never wanted us to meet, be so free. (First night out)

So we’ll keep our thoughts to ourselves tonight,
Breathing shallow curses six feet below the light.
Soak the ground with forced tears of your making;
I hope that your frozen heart is      ing and breaking.

Long way to tomorrow from my backyard’s hill,
But we’ll ignore the calling of the dealer tonight.
So break our bonds and cash in on the anger
You’ll love this get-rich-quick scheme’s fight.


© Copyright 2004 Alex Lewis - All Rights Reserved
Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
1 posted 2004-03-02 09:52 AM


wow.
"Emotion is tyranny when the heart boils black tar (summer asphalt)"
well...I really, really like the theme of this, and the images are excellent.
I saw people in a dim room dealing "cards" I saw your back yard and the hill..
It was just so well crafted.
truely artistic.
~Lex

muchos
Member
since 2003-11-29
Posts 102

2 posted 2004-03-02 08:48 PM


i could hear music playing in my head as i read this. i love reading your songs. i am way more partial to them over poetry. well. thats my opinion. i liked this part
So we’ll keep our thoughts to ourselves tonight,
Breathing shallow curses six feet below the light.
Soak the ground with forced tears of your making;
I hope that your frozen heart is      ing and breaking.


but that part is scratched out...other then that. it was awesome keep it up Young Blood. (k)

blueyedlioness
Member
since 2003-04-24
Posts 289
USA
3 posted 2004-03-03 10:37 PM


For having written it just, like, a minute ago... I think it's incredible.

I always love those spur-of-the-moment when something starts in your head and you have to write it down things. Those are usually the best.

As is this one.

-Lioness

UnsilencedWords666
Member
since 2003-11-19
Posts 63
Broken Memories & Falling Tears
4 posted 2004-03-04 11:43 AM


As always-you words are amazing...you wrote this beautifully, I am again AMAZED and wishing I had even a little bit of your talent.

*~*Nessa Bear*~*

young_blood
Senior Member
since 2003-09-19
Posts 1115
Indianapolis, IN
5 posted 2004-03-07 10:17 AM


thank you all so much for you words. I really appreciate the encouragement!
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