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Shame Day
| Teen Poetry #7 |
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Shame Day |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Cut me at the seams, So I come un-done. Do you like torturing me? Is this your idea of fun? Flush this pain, Down the drain, It no longer matters, As my world shatters. With a tear-streaked face, I walk away, Leaving my heart on the floor, To start off the day. I try and try, But still I cry, Inside my mind, 24/7 – all the time. This is all that’s left, Of what once was me, No heart, no love, Just my mind and memories. I soak up all the pain, and accept it in silence~DMX |
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| © Copyright 2003 Staci Weidner - All Rights Reserved | |||
skyshine 
since 2002-02-07
Posts 3058Beneath the northern stars |
I've felt the same way....but it always comes back....  ~sky Dreams last for so long, even after you're gone... |
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*Belabebeautiful*
since 2003-01-03
Posts 696washington, USA |
I loved this. It was absolutly perfect to my frame of mind at the moment. ~Live and Laugh~ Because of you I laugh a little harder, smile a little more, and cry a little less |
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duncan idaho Member
since 2003-11-14
Posts 70dune |
you've completely ruined the dark poem for me. I'm so sick of seeing obvious ,shallow "dark" poems (by yourself), that i am going to write about unicorns, (Personal attacked removed) [This message has been edited by vlraynes (12-05-2003 02:01 PM).] |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Didn't anyone ever teach you "If you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all" ? Besides, my critique flag isn't up, which means I don't ask for critiques such as yours. Also, no one MADE you read this poem. I soak up all the pain, and accept it in silence~DMX [This message has been edited by Spine Grinder (12-01-2003 03:06 PM).] |
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duncan idaho Member
since 2003-11-14
Posts 70dune |
am I missing something? did you put it on here just to grace us with your amazing creativity? maybe you expect everyone to read it and say "wow, what an amazing poet!" Well I didn't like it at all,(edited by moderator) [This message has been edited by vlraynes (12-05-2003 02:03 PM).] |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
like I said, no one MADE you read my poems, and like I said, MY CRITIQUE FLAG IS NOT UP. I soak up all the pain, and accept it in silence~DMX |
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Punk Angel Member
since 2001-07-25
Posts 66Pennsylvania, US |
Excuse me, if you have a problem with someone's poetry, then don't read it. No one asked for your negative comments, No one twisted your arm and forced you to read her poems, and No one really care about what you think of them. Instead of critizing her work, why don't you be useful and tell her how you personally think she can improve, instead of saying "This sucks" and accomplishing nothing? and you never would have thought in the end... how amazing it feels just to live again ~ the used |
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broken627 Member
since 2003-11-26
Posts 66Eugene Oregon |
This poem really hit me at the heart!Thank you!Also How can you be the judge if someones emotions are creative or not?grow up! -*-Broken627-*- when there was so much left to say you were soft-spoken in the hardest way endless waiting for those things,you could never say you always knew, how to break my day-*-Jacks Broken heart-*- [This message has been edited by broken627 (12-01-2003 09:41 PM).] |
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Ally Stone Junior Member
since 2003-10-20
Posts 48D.C. |
Wow...boycott Duncan Idaho's poems and pelt him with chalupas. Nobody needs this stuff. Good job, I liked it. |
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duncan idaho Member
since 2003-11-14
Posts 70dune |
Edited by Moderator Personal attacks and profanity will not be tolerated. [This message has been edited by vlraynes (12-05-2003 01:59 PM).] |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Watch your profanity, even if you are using *s and !s, you can still be kicked out. Besides, I didn't ask for this to turn into a Jerry Springer episode, so lets just stop now. I didn't ask for your criticism, so there was never any need to give it. I thought I made that point obvious. I soak up all the pain, and accept it in silence~DMX |
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kissa~rachelle Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988nowhere special |
I really loved your poem. and unlike Idaho or whatever his name is, i thought it was creative, and just because it isnt about unicorns, doesnt mean it sucks. And please idaho, watch your mouth. Didnt your mother ever teach you any manners?!? Always, ~**kissa~** |
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duncan idaho Member
since 2003-11-14
Posts 70dune |
ok, i'm sorry, really. I took out my frustration on you and I really shouldn't have. I am being hypocritical anyways, I write darker poems myself. |
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Spine Grinder Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127Standing In Silence... |
Well, I'm glad you're sorry, too bad I can't tell if you actually mean it. Tell me, how does it feel, to treat me like you do?~Orgy |
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