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Dark Poetry #4
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NormalitxButterfly
Member
since 2008-07-09
Posts 107


0 posted 2008-08-16 12:03 PM



" st johns wort "

can i help you ritualize
child with eyes of flame
little buckled shoes
swinging above the floorboards
puppets on a string
shackles and chains
chambers under the stairs
the heart of vengnce
my eyes
in a house of vengence
shall i help you visualize
a child much like your own
with eyes that no longer glow
one of many dolls upon a bed of stone
they whisper beneath the floorboards
as the keeper of the house of vengence
can i keep you mesmerized
the face you see reflects your own
all except these eyes that bleed
an artful masterpiece
the art is death
the flower vengence
the child myself
can you eternalize this portait

© Copyright 2008 Olivia - All Rights Reserved
fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

1 posted 2008-08-16 11:26 PM


I'm beginning to see a recurring pattern in these latest poems of yours.  Compared to the last poem of yours (bury me) this one pales.  In any case, you are exploring what you apparently perceive to have been a bad up-bringing in terms of the ideals with which you were raised.  Perhaps there is more to it.  

Once again you end with a tinge of hope:

an artful masterpiece
the art is death
the flower vengence
the child myself

The line "the art is death" is a tad weak.  I'm a tad tired now to come up with something better though.  In any case, the speaker is suggesting that in life she is conveying a sense of death.  That's an idea I like a fair bit since when I look around the status quo looks a lot like death.  Smile but don't be too involved with other people.  Don't step out of line.  Don't act happily or else you'll be naive.

Life's short.  Think hard!
Me!

NormalitxButterfly
Member
since 2008-07-09
Posts 107

2 posted 2008-08-19 11:29 PM


bury me is a poem i recently wrote while st johns wort is one of my older works that ii came across while trying to free up some space on my computer. i agree that it doesnt quite hold/ display the emotion as some of my other work.
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