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Mystress May
Member
since 2007-10-25
Posts 296
Taunton, MA

0 posted 2007-10-29 07:52 PM



*****This is a more 'structured' version. What do you think? Guess it may be more 'reader friendly'. Thanks dolls for any input you can give me!!!
~~~May~~~

There is only Blackness. And I am Nothing.
I am not a person, nor am I an animal.
Neither an object nor the air.
I am Nothing.

But how can Nothing move through Where?
Wouldn’t that mean that I am SomeThing?
And that the Where that I am moving through is SomeWhere?
Therefore, I am SomeThing moving through SomeWhere.
I am SomeOne.

I do not know who I am but I know that I AM.
I don’t know if I’ve never known or if I had once known and now I have forgotten.
If I had never known then why have I never discovered?
If I had once known, then why have I forgotten?
I am SomeWhere.

I do not know where this “SomeWhere” is, but it IS… and I am HERE.
It is pure blackness and I am floating in it.
I see nothing but Blackness.
I hear no sound.

Feel nothing touching the “me” that I believe I am.
Try to scream but I have no voice.
I have no senses.
Except for that of knowing that I am.
Blackness.
Silence.
Me.

An eternity of Me in the silence of Nothing.

Explosion of cacophony and color.
Rushing through the blurred colors as the dissonant clamor reverberates inside of the “me” that I am.
Dizzy.
Emetic.

The cacophonic clamor squeals to a halt.

No Color.
No Darkness.
A dim light.

Pain.
Intense Pain.
It’s shooting throughout my entire “me”.
A Weight on top of me.
The Weight belongs to that which is causing me the pain.
Must get away from that which causes the pain.

I struggle against the Weight.
I push with all of the strength that I can summon into my “me”. I envision it coming out of My limbs, against this weight that continues to wrap its maleficent fingers around My neck.

Must find a weakness in this Weight.
Wetness against my finger.
An unearthly noise… and unearthly scream.
Grip loosens on my neck.
Cool rush of air.
Crack sounds beneath my fist… thick, warm liquid falling onto my face.

Sight.
I see that Weight which seeks to crush my existence beneath it.
Red.
A stream of red.
Flooding down to the pale surface.
The pale surface that is “me”.

A flattened area in the center where once there was a nose.
A bubbling mass surging from an otherwise empty cavity that once housed an eye.

Screams.
Where do they come from?
Above me.
From the Weight.

One more burst of energy… of strength. Through my entire being.
Against the weight.

Unburdened.
The Weight is off of me. That which had caused the Weight now settles… still screaming, clutching the face from which It bleeds.

Run.
I must run.
Send message to my limbs. Move.

I rise.
Left foot rises and moves forward. Falls to the surface beneath. Right foot rises and moves forward. Falls to the surface beneath.

Whipping my face, my eyes, my arms.
Branches.
I run.

Light.
Towards the light. Must reach the light. Whipping my face, trickle of blood.

Open space.
Light all around, glaring from above.
An empty road leading into a desolate parking lot.

Asphalt.
Burning smell of fresh tar.

Sound.
Roaring.
Car approaches.
Slowly.

I see a face.
It is moving.
Mouth moving.
Sound?
Sound.
What does it say?
It does not matter.
It comes towards me slowly… arms extended.
Collapse into arms… into the arms of this stranger… this Savior

Darkness.
I sleep.

© Copyright 2007 Amanda M. Stonis - All Rights Reserved
Seeker72
Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 387
Oregon USA
1 posted 2007-10-29 11:16 PM


I like it.

I always get hooked on the "If there is nothing then it must be something."

It's like when I hear the phrase. "At the end of the Universe."

I have to wonder what's just beyond that?

Mystress May
Member
since 2007-10-25
Posts 296
Taunton, MA
2 posted 2007-10-29 11:22 PM


Don't get me started on the 'end of the universe' thing.... it hurts just thinking about it but for some reason I can't stop myself! How can something have no beginning or end? Ugh... now my brains going to be going all night hehe
Seeker72
Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 387
Oregon USA
3 posted 2007-10-29 11:24 PM


Yeah sorry about that... my mind is traveling down the same rabbit hole.

;-)

Prudy
Junior Member
since 2007-10-22
Posts 13
the prison inside me
4 posted 2007-11-05 09:02 PM


THanks for all the criticism it helps.  Also I like your poems especially this one.  I find it very philosophical.  By the way I am sorry for not replying at all but my internet hasn't really been working for a couple of days so I haven't been able to get on.  

One thing for my poems is that they might not be complete because they are feelings.  They are literally what I feel and think.  They don't really have a formal structure because of that.  They are just like my feelings. That is also why they are usually very simple and easy to get.  Or so I have been told.  If you or anyone wants to help me maybe finish my poems it would be totally cool.  Just send me a message ort something.  

moondogz
Member
since 2007-05-01
Posts 397
Great White North
5 posted 2007-11-06 07:03 AM


mistress may..don't have time to read your poem right now..on my way to work..but what happened to your other poem..the one in behind closed doors..I hope the "thought police didn't decend upon it...c u.
Mystress May
Member
since 2007-10-25
Posts 296
Taunton, MA
6 posted 2007-11-06 08:37 AM


Moondogz.... go back and check it out. Ron sent a message about an oversight re: site and he actually tweaked it so the title could return. yay!!!
moondogz
Member
since 2007-05-01
Posts 397
Great White North
7 posted 2007-11-07 07:33 AM


hey..I looked, I be happy...no thought police...I read poem later...have attention span of fruit fly in morning...cu bye.
moondogz
Member
since 2007-05-01
Posts 397
Great White North
8 posted 2007-11-07 02:25 PM


Interesting poem...very graphic..at first I thought it's about the experience of being born...then later I'm not sure..like it shifted dimensions in the middle..and then is about escape from an assault...maybe there both the same thing...that's it, I think.  Anyway..enjoyable read.
Mystress May
Member
since 2007-10-25
Posts 296
Taunton, MA
9 posted 2007-11-07 03:24 PM


It's about being strangled and regaining conciousness.

Our scars are the foundation for what we have become

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