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Dark Poetry #4
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Grinch
Member Elite
since 2005-12-31
Posts 2929
Whoville

0 posted 2007-09-20 06:45 PM


God had his beady eye on me.

Well we will see.

White coats dissect the massacre,
Sort Calvin Klein from vascular,
Kneecaps from stray blacktop
While stemming blood and talking shop.

Doctors lose their patients every day.

Well so do I.

Their antiseptic handling
And anesthetic rambling
The graveside manners that they use
Discussing parts that THEY may lose.

Needles pluck, a prick at every side.

Well you decide.

Counting back from ten to one
And waking up when all is done,
A brain that feels like scrambled eggs
Alone, confused, left searching for my legs.


© Copyright 2007 Grinch - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2007-09-20 07:07 PM


You hiding in the dark, Grinch?  

"God had his beady eye on me."

ooooh, but you open with a note of quiet defiance--and proceed to raise the bet.

The only thing I don't like about this is my guesstimate at the source of inspiration.

but then, haven't we been encouraged from childhood to

"rage, rage, against the dying of the light"?

You capture my own indignant rage with this'n.

(and that's right, I'll damned well follow you around if need be!)

Seeker72
Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 387
Oregon USA
2 posted 2007-09-27 11:54 PM


"Alone, confused, left searching for my legs."

Damn quality line I must say, bloody good poem.

taramw
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738

3 posted 2007-10-11 09:27 AM


I loved this!!!

Lots of connotations... but then, i suppose that is dependable on the reader and what is happening in their life!! lol

Terrific.

It's better to be a lion for a day than a sheep all your life.
-- Sister Elizabeth Kenny

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