The odyssey unaccomplished

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Dark Poetry #4

The odyssey unaccomplished

UseTheIllusion
Member

since 2006-02-06

Posts 223
In a state of limbo

0 posted 2006-08-11 11:13 PM

On an ancient quest to discover paths not walked upon,
Primordial belief system, rejected by those who balked,
He is but a man continuing the journey,
Only by tip toeing across the maelstrom will he prove worthy,
Combating the absurdity of a world built on the foundation of a destroyed city,
Created by a god who invented chains in order to enslave his children,
He did not invent religion, though he did invent himself,
This idol prohibiting idols, repressing even grown adults.

Wandering through the jungle the hero’s mind is set in motion,
As the demons step beside the path to create a gauntlet through which to stumble,
Nothing can stop this cosmic voyager as he hacks his way through the muddle,
Nothing except his naiveté, will the hero break the bubble?
As he neared the end of innocence he surely was in trouble,
And with himself he battled, wounded grievously in the scuffle.

Forced fed lies through a breathing tube,
Resuscitation methods made him feel blue,
His darkest self kept on him like glue,
It was only a matter of time before he gave up on the ruse,
So he made up an excuse to flee his home,
He left his world behind and wandered all alone,
He tried to atone, but no one would listen,
His prayers went unheard and he succumbed to the system,
His journey lay incomplete and there the story ends,
Yet it is but a chapter in the story of his life,
Eventually he will mend his ways, the real odyssey will begin.

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

1 posted 2006-08-12 07:49 AM

Liked the inner rhyme structure here. Interesting read. Flowed well.
The image of man healing himself was good...understanding the questions that arise within the context of what we are raised to believe, and what we need to find out.
Much light in the darkness.
TD

UseTheIllusion
Member

since 2006-02-06

Posts 223
In a state of limbo

2 posted 2006-08-14 12:54 PM

thank you sir.

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