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Dark Poetry #4
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Purity
Senior Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 526
Once Upon, USA

0 posted 2006-06-03 01:04 AM


I waltzed across the concrete sky today
hoping that you'd joyfully meet me up there somewhere.
The brilliant colors of a distant rainbow
taunted me from just beyond the reach of my extended arms.
I saw, and so I called out to you at once
with every ounce of harmonic breath I could muster.
You glanced my way for one brief moment in time,
ceasing your playful ways to acknowledge me with a smile.
But as quickly as a promise ever reminded
can fade into a distant horizon like the sun bidding adieu,
you winked and carried on: a single ray of light dancing
amidst a seemingly dark and hopeless horizon.  


Wings bruised from turning away in such confined space...Not broken...still healable...still feathered with life, somewhere

© Copyright 2006 Carrigan Chantz - All Rights Reserved
niere
Member
since 2006-04-23
Posts 77

1 posted 2006-06-03 02:39 PM


''you winked and carried on: a single ray of light dancing
amidst a seemingly dark and hopeless horizon.''

I love that line. The contrast is great.

excellent write.

Digital_Hell
Member
since 2006-06-05
Posts 202
Amidst black roses
2 posted 2006-06-07 12:59 PM


i love the contrast you create with the last line. and the prospect of hope is great!
EveGnosis
Member
since 2002-02-21
Posts 300
New York, USA
3 posted 2006-07-12 12:52 PM


wow, purity. don't know how i missed this one. it is absolutely beautiful, and i totally felt this, and could visualize it as i read it. great metaphor here!

mike

of all the things we try to find... it's only love we keep.

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx
4 posted 2006-07-14 05:31 AM


Wow... Its amazing how now I'm looking at this through the eyes with which I'm seeing.  I guess sometimes you just have to crawl instead of walk.

God bless,
In Christ,
-Craig

To wrestle is to live; to fight is to love.

Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715
New Zealand
5 posted 2006-07-15 05:01 AM




*waves* Hi Carri!
How beautiful. I'm listening to Blackbird by The Beatles at the moment and it is the most beautiful accompaniment to your poem.

Good to see your name, and to read your words.

Courtney.

Come on God, do I seem bulletproof?

Venus1974
Member
since 2006-07-15
Posts 79
Tennessee, USA
6 posted 2006-07-15 10:34 PM


I love the artistic expression used in this ...sets you right there love it

Peace and happiness to us all, Venus

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