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kif kif
Member
since 2006-06-01
Posts 439
BCN

0 posted 2006-06-01 07:00 PM


(I wanted to draw a picture, but my relationship tonight is in black and white, so I write. To colour in character, a painting of words, compartmental bursts, trying to find the answer in a fly's sight.)

Trapped in one big compound eye,
surrounded on all sides by a limpid sky
searing holes in the fractal that is made by the wire,

so I build a fire.

See beyond, my people of creation.
I am with you before the end of time,
entwined to conspire.

Rapt in the mold of reflection,
where we burn our liars
wrung out with a greed.
I retreat, for

there's no going back from destruction.

Hear this dawn, a feeble salutation
lapping down rigged water-pipes,
swimming in pools of disjointed, strange light,

the sap of my needs.

[This message has been edited by kif kif (06-03-2006 08:16 PM).]

© Copyright 2006 kif kif - All Rights Reserved
niere
Member
since 2006-04-23
Posts 77

1 posted 2006-06-03 01:54 PM


''I am with you before the end of time,
entwined to conspire.''

I love that line.

Infact i love the whole thing.
Great write.

kif kif
Member
since 2006-06-01
Posts 439
BCN
2 posted 2006-06-03 03:30 PM


Thanks, niere. I was worried nobody would get anything from this, it's my newest writing, and the abstraction of 'the wire' is still bugging me. I hope my reference to the 'rigged water-pipes' will make the loop, but I'm unsure...in a colloqial sense, it could be the divide, or 'we're wired'.I do think it works with the elemental theme, but I don't like things that dangle from nowhere, no matter how surreal, because surreal to me means realer than real.

"I am with you before the end of time/entwined to conspire" is a play on opposites, like a contradiction. I'm not saying I'll be with you forever, and it's not inspiring, but our entwinement has become neccesary to breathe. I dunno, it was a stream of (un)conciousness!

I wrote this after reading a quote in an article about surrealism, by Laura Cummings "when things stop looking like themselves, and start to resemble their contradictions." It's a take on subjectivity-we all look at things from our little compartments, and we're all caught up in the 'me', 'you', 'them' and 'us' thing-'rapt in the mold of reflection'. Of course, it's also all about relationships.

[This message has been edited by kif kif (06-03-2006 08:17 PM).]

Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
3 posted 2006-08-09 08:36 PM


Actually the scene I got was of burning bridges, as in the oft used saying.  Especially with the 'water-pipes' phrase.  Yanno, 'pipes' or poles rising out of water or bridge supports.

Just the image which crept in my mind.

kif kif
Member
since 2006-06-01
Posts 439
BCN
4 posted 2006-08-10 10:26 AM


Cool, thanks for your comment, Alicat. It would fit with the 'rigged' thing.

*Do you think this could be called an absurdist write, or is it all too abstract, with little realistic illusion? Plus, can some sort of a logical progression be worked into an absurdist write?  

I'm wondering, (*get ready for more sounds of pretentiousness, sorry) if the 'displacement' theme can be contained within the content, or if the absurd is expressed stylistically? I've been reading about how conventional language is no real communication, and I think that that 'the theatre of the absurd' breaks down conventional language to show it's impotence. Just my interpretation...heheh.

[This message has been edited by kif kif (08-10-2006 11:02 AM).]

Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
5 posted 2006-08-10 02:06 PM


Check out Prose for some of my writings during an Absurdist phase.  They should be near the top of the search.  Having loved Lear, Ogg and Nash, as well as Dodgson's (aka Carroll's) Snark, it was very easy to slip into the semantical expression if verbal tonality, selecting contrasting and complimentary verbiage based on tonal quality, pleasingness of sound, and augmentation within said work.  Another would be my tribute to Carroll found in Haven: Carolingian.

A very interesting site to peruse some absurdist and otherwise bizarre works would be http://absurdist.cc/ which incidentally is run by my gf's youngest brother.  He has his own share of strangeness there by the name of Polycarp, but that's not the sole reason I visit and have submitted there.

burntsiena
Junior Member
since 2006-08-10
Posts 34
Rhode Island
6 posted 2006-08-11 12:24 PM


there is no going back from destruction sometimes...
kif kif
Member
since 2006-06-01
Posts 439
BCN
7 posted 2006-08-11 08:38 AM


Many thanks, Alicat. It seems I asked exactly the right person!

Thanks for the comment, burntsienna. I can hear echoes of 'forward', but what's to say there will be anywhere to go?

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