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Dark Poetry #4
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PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return

0 posted 2004-12-07 04:25 PM


Spun out, just a little.
Screaming, just a little.
Bleeding just a little.
But you refuse to see.

Claim you couldn't read my eyes,
hear my screams,
smell my blood.
Taste my rage.

Watch me fall,
battered and broken.
Through shattered glass
and uneven stairs,
or stares.
That's mine.

Mirrored on the floor,
my soul.
Running red and sparkling.
Life embodied in one color.

But I can't feel my body.
Looking in, watching.
Someone else is moving, talking.
Staying sane.

Someone with my name.

[This message has been edited by PainBaneChaos (12-08-2004 06:12 PM).]

© Copyright 2004 Chaos - All Rights Reserved
stevebrklynnyc
Member
since 2004-01-04
Posts 292
GA, Camden
1 posted 2004-12-07 04:46 PM


Wow, I enjoyed this muchly!!!!!!!!
Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715
New Zealand
2 posted 2004-12-07 08:08 PM


Nice write, made me smile at the end, just because you displayed the feeling with such good wording and honesty. Very good write PBC.

Hollow.
Courtney.

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad. The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. - Gary Jules, Mad World.

WinterWren
Senior Member
since 2002-12-01
Posts 1044
...Coming to
3 posted 2004-12-07 08:30 PM


Woah...Im almost speachless. I couldn't possibly describe how much I love this, or how much I can relate right now.
Perfect piece of art here.
This is going in my library.

But Im comforted
by the fact that I can hurt inside
all I want to
without anyone ever knowing
~WinterWren~

spritrider87
Member
since 2003-05-31
Posts 294
NH
4 posted 2004-12-08 10:37 AM


......wow....please stop reading my mind....this was a really good piece. keep writing. Static.
spritrider87@yahoo.com

As I look at this world and realize that I am the only one to have seen the end of all Good I let the tears out that and ask the world to see them.

PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return
5 posted 2004-12-08 06:11 PM


Thanks everyone.  I wrote this one in the middle of class, and don't you just love it when words start to flow out of your brain without you having to think about them?

"World's use is cold, world's love is vain, world's cruelty is bitter bane; but is not the fruit of pain." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx
6 posted 2004-12-08 11:16 PM


Yeah it is a nice piece of art.  Write on.

-GIS

let God  ROAR,... in power...

darkness_witch
Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516
Underneath
7 posted 2004-12-09 02:25 AM


Watch me fall,
battered and broken.
Through shattered glass
and uneven stairs,
or stares.
That's mine.

wow so good
awesome stuff ... this one really rocked
keep them coming i just love to read them

love and empathy
sophie

nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world.

silhouetted
Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537
New Zealand
8 posted 2004-12-16 08:06 PM


aahhh! woah, now this was good. i haven't read your stuff in a while and i realised i miss it! its so good!

LOR

you're the only one keeping me alive

PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return
9 posted 2004-12-17 07:17 AM


Wow, thanks.  I didn't realize I would be missed.  Just abit of writer's block, and I find I dont' have the energy to care.  I'll work on it.

"World's use is cold, world's love is vain, world's cruelty is bitter bane; but is not the fruit of pain." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
10 posted 2004-12-21 10:31 AM


wow...
I'm impressed.
Its so intensely portrayed.

PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return
11 posted 2004-12-21 09:49 PM


Thanks, the reply means a lot.

"World's use is cold, world's love is vain, world's cruelty is bitter bane; but is not the fruit of pain." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

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