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Dark Poetry #4
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Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California

0 posted 2004-11-20 02:43 PM


Caffeine veins.
Flowers burst like popcorn kernels to life to dissolve in the moist air of an open mouth.
The drizzle of the November rain melts them all into a salty, soggy pile.

Its like white vomit when I’ve been eating away at my four pretty walls.
Paint between my teeth makes my smile appear even bigger.
Pulsing behind my eyes shocked with red lines.
Caffeine veins, blue and rushing.
Rushing fragmented voices through baggage check.

Overlooked the knife, hidden in the inner pouch and its cutting in now.
Popcorn flowers burst in bloom, speckled red.
Because its cutting in now…uneven smile.
This is what I get and it’s a lot.
It’s a lot more then I can handle.

I’m left with the unpoped kernels at the bottom of the bowl.
Swallow them whole
where they can burst into bloom in my stomach, thriving in the dry and empty climate.
White vomit and hand picked thoughts.
The knife has slit the veins which are webbed and tangled, its slit them free.  

© Copyright 2004 Alexis Smith - All Rights Reserved
PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return
1 posted 2004-11-20 09:25 PM


I'm trying to think of the right words... and can't.  It's obvious that the imagery was really good, but that doesn't need saying, it goes deeper than that. I don't know.  I guess I should say something supportive like "cutting doesn't solve anything" but I don't know whether it's you in this poem, or just a piece of you, or not you at all, and I can't back up my statement in the first place.   Enough with the babble. This was all just to say that I liked it, and I wish I had come up with it first. >.<

"World's use is cold, world's love is vain, world's cruelty is bitter bane; but is not the fruit of pain." Elizabeth Barrett Browning

darkness_witch
Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516
Underneath
2 posted 2004-11-21 03:25 AM


hmmm

i cant think of a good rpely but basically.. it made me think. and im not too sure if i fully understand it, just because its such a different poem.

i love your poems because theyre all different from the one before it and they make a great change from the rest of the poems posted in this forum

keep them coming, they entertain me

love and empathy
sophie

BTW: this reply should definitly be taken as a compliment cus you are an amazing poet/writer, with such a talent!

nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world.

Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California
3 posted 2004-11-24 10:31 PM


thank you sophie. your a sweet heart.

oh and this is definitely not about self harm. its more about release. like my veins have been cut free from the tangled mess that I was. but not literally.
thanks for you time guys.

silhouetted
Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537
New Zealand
4 posted 2004-12-16 08:56 PM


the first line was really cool! nice way of putting it huh!

LOR

you're the only one keeping me alive

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