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Dark Poetry #4
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silhouetted
Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537
New Zealand

0 posted 2004-09-18 10:57 PM


boiling within me
is this pain i cant explain
cant understand
cant control
and i just want to know
if anything will ever come of this
or if i'll be left to stand alone
in the cold again
watching you turn away
watching you close your eyes
leaving this like it is
dont leave me hanging
on a thread so breakable
so fragile
that at any moment the pain will force me
to contort and writhe
and buckle this thread
and fall flat
fall on my face
for you
and you'll just watch
that same empty look on your face
the one thats says you dont care
or is it that you care too much?
too much you have to turn away
pretend nothing ever happened
cause thats whats best for me, right?
cause you think i'd be better off without you
but you dont know
you will never know
just how worse off i'd be
you wont even begin to realise
how dead i'd be without you
without your touch
without your face
without those eyes
so dont tell me i'm better off
dont tell me whats best for me
cause no matter what you say
i'll twist it around
so all points to you


put your frustrations into four letter words - incubus

[This message has been edited by silhouetted (09-19-2004 01:42 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 L - All Rights Reserved
Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715
New Zealand
1 posted 2004-09-18 11:03 PM


YOU HAVE IT BACK!

you have every ounce of inspiration back. i am so glad. so happy. so amazed and impressed. bloody hell, this was great. nice end, nice beginning, nice middle, nice theme....or not so nice as it may be, but great great great prodigious work.

eek!

Hollow,
Courts. xxx

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad. The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. - Gary Jules, Mad World.

darkness_witch
Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516
Underneath
2 posted 2004-09-19 06:07 AM


wow
dont know wot to say

dude this one really hit a chord or two

umm i defintily really really liked it

and i really like ur toher two as well, but i wont bother replying to them cus my comps screwed.

i love it

keep on keeping on

nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world.

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
3 posted 2004-09-19 03:06 PM


Laura?

this is why I love writing, raw packed emotion . . .

amazing write, missy . . .

silhouetted
Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537
New Zealand
4 posted 2004-09-20 04:21 AM


thanks

i was quite proud of this one. it reminded me of how i used to write. prob cuz i was just reading some of my old stuff and the replies i got there, and they were way better than the ones i get now. So i changed back to my old writing self!

or the fact that i got my inspiration from jewel again may help....

LOR

put your frustrations into four letter words - incubus

vampiana
Member
since 2004-09-08
Posts 296
Nothing and Nowhere
5 posted 2004-09-22 12:31 PM


wow..
this one gave me shivers all down my spine...
i LOOVED it..
yes, thats right, not only did i LOVE it..i went so far as to LOOVE it! two O's!
Kirsty
(i know im insane..)

"Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?"-Frank from Donnie Darko

kissa~rachelle
Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988
nowhere special
6 posted 2004-09-26 10:29 PM


Damn...


I really loved this one too. It made me sad.

Karissa

I ask why, but in my mind,
I find i cant really rely on myself.
~~~Linkin Park~~~

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