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Dark Poetry #4
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PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return

0 posted 2004-08-17 01:46 PM


Idle ramblings of the deranged
spilling from my head.
Vipera Berus, coiled, tense
striking my mind.
Piercing my thoughts.
Poisoning my soul.
Coursing through my veins,
white hot.
Searing.
Purifying.
Burning the taint from every cell,
the saturation of evil
that plagues my being.
Leaving behind a contented numbness.
An easy, disjointed unawareness.
A non-being.
Letting me sink into blissful oblivion
at last.


[This message has been edited by PainBaneChaos (08-18-2004 11:48 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 Chaos - All Rights Reserved
green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 2003-06-26
Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx
1 posted 2004-09-05 03:23 PM


Form what I get its basically saying you are finally getting to concentrate on the big picture and all the garbage that blotted out your personal is being thrown out.  No more junk and be who you are.  That sounds like the attitude that tells an uncommitted lover to leave you to your own life and to get out so you can concentrate more on you.  Nice poem.
-GIS

He has made everything beautiful in its own time.  -Ecclesiastes 3:11

fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

2 posted 2004-09-05 08:18 PM


This poem seems to be full of a great deal of irony.  Firstly, the viper's sting acts as a purifying agent.  Perhaps the snake is symbolic of some purifying attribute of death?  However, as the poem goes on that purification slowly moves into numbness and contentedness presumably so that the speaker/victim is unaware of his/her ultimate terminal fate.

2+2=5 for sufficiently large values of 2
--Smit
My Creations

PainBaneChaos
Member
since 2003-10-17
Posts 150
The point of no return
3 posted 2004-09-05 10:40 PM


This one was about one act that was so inherently self-destructive that it killed the subject.  The adder wasn't really a snake, but consequences that spun the life of the subject in a downward spiral.  Somewhere along the way, the subject acquired a deep apathy.  And the subject was, in essence, killed.  Not in a bodily sense.  But the life of the subject was no longer whole.  Am I making sense?

It's not the letting go that hurts, it's the holding on.

fractal007
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958

4 posted 2004-09-06 02:13 PM


Aahh.  Nice work then, my friend.  Your snake image does well in eliciting a Biblical allusion.  Who was the first temptor?  The serpent!  Nice work and glad you added that spirally imagery to your explanation.  

2+2=5 for sufficiently large values of 2
--Smit
My Creations

Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715
New Zealand
5 posted 2004-09-06 03:38 PM


Thanks for the explanation, I was thinking the same as fractal, but now...wow, it means more than that now.

Hollow.

I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad. The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. - Gary Jules, Mad World.

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