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Dark Poetry #4
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darkness_witch
Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516
Underneath

0 posted 2004-04-12 04:58 AM


*note: nothing to do with suicide or self-mutilation*

all i need is a reminder
something to tell me
i dont have to inflict such pain
on myself
to feel the hurt i feel on the inside
on the outside.

all i need is a message
something to remind me that
i dont need to run
to escpae myself

all i need is a breathe of air
to tell myself its not worth it

to tell myself there
is something worth fighting for
something worth struggling for

something like you

*Im sure alot of people can realte to this, like myself. This is just feelings and nothing more, nothing less. Id like to know some thoughts on this poem and anything to improve it, I really want to work this one.*

nirvana means freedom from pain, suffering and the external world.

© Copyright 2004 Sophie A Ryan - All Rights Reserved
River
Senior Member
since 2003-09-16
Posts 627
my own little world
1 posted 2004-04-12 04:52 PM


hey this is nice, i like =)

    - River

sleep my precious slumber

Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member
since 2004-02-01
Posts 715
New Zealand
2 posted 2004-04-12 10:49 PM


.........This is great

Wow, 205 posts!, anyway this is a really good poem i liked the ending lovie. Very much.
"Something like you...."
(having a gud holiday lol?)
Ciao,
Hollow

"Why are my visions so unliving with dreams? And why do I no longer care?" - Stygian

kissa~rachelle
Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988
nowhere special
3 posted 2004-04-12 11:30 PM


I nkow how you feel. I do... i really do. I wish that i didnt, but i do.

I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling

aujussy wolf
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2003-08-09
Posts 1215
Michigan
4 posted 2004-04-13 12:01 PM


dw , really good write here girly
it draws the reader in well   even for a rereading or two  
i did notice one word that you might have misspelled ( escape ) no biggie babe
still impressed though
-wolf

aussie teen
Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 396
Australia
5 posted 2004-04-18 05:36 AM


i know how you feel.....
i know how hard it is to write something about what is going on inside of you... letting people into your head....
that is something im still compltely petrified of......
nice write and keep up the writing...
Mel

so this is me but what do you care about that????

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