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green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

0 posted 2004-03-01 01:45 PM

I turn to salute the east, the west, the north, south
Dizzieness over takes me and my desire
Motivated to make a difference
A thin slice 4 inches deep across my abs of strength

Green leaves dried for harvest add to the poison
Inside my head choked of fresh freely moving air
Shrivel drought wasted bladder collapse on myself
And look up

I see the better species pronounced over my
Biologically instable body
Firm state of psychology

Opened the door to ravage beast of intellect
Shread of me left behind
Asking for God's favor and slipping in place back
Down the slide of progression.

Right outside the town
A proven fact of my rosy red forehead
And the bloodstained sharp articles I carry around
In my pocket
Just for the purpose of self-satisfacton after the
Congratulations only parasites know how to give
Appropriately

My adviser seems to have retired and I just want
A better stance and chance to live
And the fatter I become

Why live for gold when you can be happy?

[...and the work, it was fun.]-Kurt Cobain

River
Senior Member

since 2003-09-16

Posts 627
my own little world

1 posted 2004-03-01 04:35 PM

this is really sad, but it's something that is easy to get into, like all of your poems =) i like. *hugs* bro, & still praying.

- Bonnie Sue

sleep my precious slumber

green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member

since 2003-06-26

Posts 1929
New Caney, Tx

2 posted 2004-03-02 08:07 AM

Thanx River. You're a cool friend to have.

GIS

Why live for gold when you can be happy?

[...and the work, it was fun.]-Kurt Cobain

River
Senior Member

since 2003-09-16

Posts 627
my own little world

3 posted 2004-03-02 01:50 PM

no problemo =)

sleep my precious slumber

eor
Senior Member

since 2002-09-26

Posts 959
blues & greys

4 posted 2004-03-04 02:06 AM

i like it, this si somewhat different from your normal stylr but i like it nice write

"So what befalls the flawless?
Look what I've built, it shines so beautifully now watch as it destroys me."

DarkSide_Blues
Junior Member

since 2003-03-08

Posts 41
Fl, Usa.

5 posted 2004-03-05 04:06 PM

Though I'm fairly sure it wasn't the message you were -trying- to get across, for some reason, I pictured the last stand of a less the altruistic old warrior. Something about your poetry just makes my mind start playing games with me. Good job!

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