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Dark Poetry #4
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Lexy
Senior Member
since 2003-01-28
Posts 1038
California

0 posted 2004-02-20 08:02 PM


it's really not enough, I will cry until I bleed if I need to.
Unstable...
mentally.
A fog, and I see the outline of your body.
Your tears are producing this mist I walk between.
I will hold your hand and not worry about tommorow,
or how the numbers will leave my heart sunburnt.

I hope that time will give me a childish glow, instead of a glass shattering scream.
A scream for this comfort, I can never seem to get.

Please come and hold my heart, even if its lightly.
I think that it could keep me from falling.
I don't expect happiness or despair.
I am a selfless slave to your blue eyes.

Come and wrap me up into your arms.
I know your afraid your thorns will cut me,
but they will only make me kiss you harder.
Bruise me.
I'd rather be a rainbow, then a shadow produced by your hand.
Hand puppets with fangs, up on your ceiling.
The pain continues to enthrall me.

An oil rainbow on the asphalt, run over and over.
But if you look at me from that certain angle, I still shine.
Because of the light from your beautiful blue eyes.

© Copyright 2004 Alexis Smith - All Rights Reserved
darkness_witch
Senior Member
since 2003-12-03
Posts 516
Underneath
1 posted 2004-02-20 09:53 PM


oh wow.
this is fantastic. i felt my heartbreak as i read this. i felt my whole body melt. is is beautiful, sad, yet beuaitful.

extraordinary.
as i read it i could hear a sad piano ensemble playing as an soundtrack to it!

i would say my usual keep rockin but it dusnt fit this.

well done.

darkness

You can always hear a tear in Cobain's voice, the pain going on there is always visible through his lyrics - Marilon Manson

River
Senior Member
since 2003-09-16
Posts 627
my own little world
2 posted 2004-02-21 05:57 PM


*is frozen with shock, barely unable to speak, eyes are bulging, and is extremely happy to have read such a gripping poem!!!* ...this is breathtaking Lexy, i really really really like it, lol. the imagery is awesome...this would be one of my fave parts: "I know your afraid your thorns will cut me, but they will only make me kiss you harder"...lol, groovy groovy gravy!!! rok on. =)

      - River

sleep my precious slumber

silhouetted
Senior Member
since 2004-01-30
Posts 537
New Zealand
3 posted 2004-02-21 06:02 PM


it was going one way, then the next it was going somewhere else

i wrote one like this a bit of a while ago called Golden eyes, but i must say ur poem is beta

i really liked that part too river
that line really really caught me anfd i thought wat a great writer u are!!!!

KEEP IT UP

LOR

"They'll love you just the way you are, if your perfect" - Alanis Morisette

kissa~rachelle
Senior Member
since 2003-11-27
Posts 988
nowhere special
4 posted 2004-02-21 06:53 PM


I like the ending, it was awesome.  This was really sad, but really amzing and wonderful at the same time.
~Vampire Kisses  

I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling

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