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Hollow_Emptiness
Senior Member

since 2004-02-01

Posts 715
New Zealand

0 posted 2004-02-11 02:07 AM

Patches of grey,
Amongst the black and white,
But can anyone see the red?
The red hot anger in your eyes,

I'm fragile take caution,
Handle with care,
I'm packaged up in boxes,
Because of the cracks that ive attached,

I know you feel my desperation,
And i can see you watch my pain,
But your hands are limp and your shoulders burnt,
With the tears that boil on my face,

I look at you again,
The red hot anger in your eyes,
I turn my face away,
And grip my hands tightly together,

Because in my withered hand I hold,
A faded photograph

I linger in the shadows, I breathe when I see you.

darkness_witch
Senior Member

since 2003-12-03

Posts 516
Underneath

1 posted 2004-02-11 10:18 PM

hey i like this one! love the boxes part

hehehehe

I can just see old ags holding the photo in her withered hand! LOLOLOL

hehehe

sry im not online, doing homework but just thought I better see wats happening!

keep them coming dude yaknow ill neva stop reading them!

darkness

You can always hear a tear in Cobain's voice, the pain going on there is always visible through his lyrics - Marilon Manson

silhouetted
Senior Member

since 2004-01-30

Posts 537
New Zealand

2 posted 2004-02-12 12:01 PM

nice mate
lol me and soph went on habbo last nite!!!
such a crack up
lol see u soooon
byebye

Silhouetted by Deception

River
Senior Member

since 2003-09-16

Posts 627
my own little world

3 posted 2004-02-15 12:42 PM

wow, this is awesome! i'm speechless now =) great job.

- River

sleep my precious slumber

Grover
Senior Member

since 2004-01-27

Posts 1967
London, ON, Canada

4 posted 2004-02-15 02:02 PM

Very good! Grover.

kissa~rachelle
Senior Member

since 2003-11-27

Posts 988
nowhere special

5 posted 2004-02-19 10:28 PM

"I know you feel my desperation,
And i can see you watch my pain,
But your hands are limp and your shoulders burnt,
With the tears that boil on my face,"

Very nice. I like this. This part of the poem was the part that stood out to me the most.

~Vampire Kisses

I want a relationship i can finally sink my teeth into.~ Alexander Sterling

Paper Tiger
Member

since 2003-09-28

Posts 77

6 posted 2004-02-20 04:08 PM

I liked it. Great imagery!

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