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Open Poetry #30
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muted
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since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949
Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving

0 posted 2004-01-20 01:08 PM


I've lost.
A gambler, spent,
holding my breath
as losers often do.

So much owing
but my soul
wont fetch much
on the black market.

And too much time
has been borrowed
knowing "sorry"
has dropped in value.

I'll repay someday
the way liars often do
with broken promises
and years old faded schemes.

The begger I'll always be
cheating at the game
forever holding my hand out
in need from you.

But in my shame
my poverty, my plight
im sure we could strike a deal
Please come and reclaim.

(this is my attempt at an apology that may never be heard)

Someday I'll fly, Someday I'll soar,
Someday I'll be So damn much more
Cause I'm bigger than my body
Gives me credit for.
~John Mayer

© Copyright 2004 Dawn van Krieken-Smith - All Rights Reserved
Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
1 posted 2004-01-20 01:17 PM


Dawn~

Very nicely done...

and might I add, what a fine picture!  You are one beautiful woman.

"sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.."
~Dido~

bslicker
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since 2000-12-04
Posts 2321
state of mind
2 posted 2004-01-20 01:22 PM


good write

i hope the one that needs to read this from you does !!

bernie

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2004-01-20 01:25 PM


sometimes its enough the apology is made to ourselves.
welcome back to poetry land Dawn.

How foolish must man be, not to be impressed by mountains and trees
not to be brought to his knees by the beauty of the sky and sea

Cherokee Lore

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

4 posted 2004-01-20 01:42 PM


the apology, even if never read by others, when comes from the heart is enough.
welcome to Passions!

Terrina
Member
since 2003-12-31
Posts 166
California
5 posted 2004-01-20 02:43 PM


This is outstanding, and oh so true.

Sorry has lost it's value. I believe that, we throw it around. But I believe it is meant here.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
6 posted 2004-01-20 03:03 PM


The begger I'll always be
cheating at the game
forever holding my hand out
in need from you.


wonderful..there are those of us who always are in hopes that "forgiven" never becomes an obsolete word.

hugs
M

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

7 posted 2004-01-20 03:08 PM


well. as an apology.. it seems heartfelt..

I hope it reaches who it is intended for


muted
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since 2004-01-15
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Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving
8 posted 2004-01-20 03:12 PM


Susan: *blush* thank you so much for that little suprising compliment...very uplifting!

bernie: even if that person never see's my apology, im so glad you could make it! thank you for visiting my little box, and making me smile

Janet Marie: you are a legend, and having you here is a lovely thing indeed! and thank you for the wisdom, though i may be slow in learning....

gentle spirit: your name suits you perfectly!
thank you so much!

Terrina: thank you, i so glad you understand!

Maureen: *sigh*, even if im not forgiven, i just had to shout out that i was wrong! i suppose the rest is up to destiny...

Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
9 posted 2004-01-20 04:18 PM




(smiles) With a heart as sensitive that can feel as yours, I certainly hope you are forgiven as lies and words leave scars but it doesn't mean one can't get their apology accepted, God Bless You, I send support angel hugs your way, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Dawn, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

"You'll find something that's enough to keep you
But if the bright lights don't receive you
You should turn yourself around and come back home" MB20

Ravenwolfvoyager
Member
since 2003-12-25
Posts 326

10 posted 2004-01-20 05:03 PM


Sometimes it's what is written in your heart and you've clearly made an amends through this outstanding write. I sincerely enjoyed this. Thank you.
Endlessecho
Member
since 2003-09-05
Posts 398
I live within myself
11 posted 2004-01-20 05:06 PM


one of the best apologies I've ever heard.  Because it was so honest and, as was said, heartfelt.  Beautifully written.
Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
12 posted 2004-01-20 06:39 PM


Honest words of apology...thank you for sharing this, and I indeed hope the intended recieves your message.

Patricia

choshi
Senior Member
since 2004-01-01
Posts 1184
New York
13 posted 2004-01-21 09:02 AM


heard or unheard, your voice rings true...~C
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
14 posted 2004-01-21 06:44 PM


This is beautiful work... and whether the intended recipient reads these words or not, I hope they hear your heart. *S* Welcome to Passions! *S*
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