If Memory Fails And No One's Around Does It Make A Sound?

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icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

0 posted 2004-01-11 06:33 PM

I never want to have to write myself a note
reminding me I once loved you.
Hopefully
if I live to see that day come,
I will already have forgotten us both,
you most of all,
the view,
the sound,
the scent of having you around;
I lived too long
trying to forget a life you never knew
to carry for us both
a life you never cared to remember.

Now with all these years gone,
both busy building lives apart,
me at my end game
you at the start,
where I used to cry
I can laugh
about my heart and how it found the will
to beat around the dagger buried deep,
still set where placed so long ago;
I didn't know your memory span was dwindling,
superficially at first
since you are so much younger
it's as if it was your soul that was left bleeding,
instead of mine.

Once I made a life of reading sign
yet I missed this simple soft reality,
the fragile spoor of desiccated thought
left only in disconnected moments
of intense passion and emotion,
I still recall
you and I
standing back to back against the world,
or in games of self-indulgent make believe
without a clue how it was for you,
it was not ‘til now I knew
the cliche "out of sight, out of mind"
was carved from virgin thought for you.

Sure
we all forget at times,
and it's true there are whole blocks
of years I can barely name,
or which I can not even shade
with some specific year,
but I don't fear the loss of mind;
I can recall
even deep in my cups
in dead of night,
or at the crackling slice of dawn,
where we went,
things we did,
how we loved,
how it felt to know you;
I recall it all
even from before your birth,
the crimes of my youth,
where I was,
who I killed,
what I built,
or that which I destroyed,
or how I set the plans
for others to enact the tasks at hand
in cold blooded linear span,
though it lacks all matter for me now;
I can't forget scenes no human mind should view,
to forget a love as fine as what I knew
escapes my reach of understanding how.

In the years I mourned your loss,
I had no insight no grasp
of how narrow your reference points
so quickly had become,
how sheltered your shivering sadness,
how simple your sycophant madness;
for me it's not the same
it goes beyond the rim of disappointment
understanding if I talk with you today,
and thread the thoughts carefully within a conversation
we might have had yesterday,
or are yet to have tomorrow,
that there is hope but the slightest chance
you might recall my name.

            ©2004 by icebox

[This message has been edited by icebox (01-11-2004 07:52 PM).]

nothing
Junior Member

since 2004-01-10

Posts 23
Northumberland, UK

1 posted 2004-01-11 06:46 PM

that's so beautiful it hurts.

"it's as if it was your soul that was left bleeding,
instead of mine."

I love these lines.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

2 posted 2004-01-11 07:11 PM

well.....all I can say is there isn't a line in here that I couldn't feel.

This has to be one of your finest!
And it is very easy to read your heart between these lines.

M

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

3 posted 2004-01-11 07:34 PM

icebox

Your memories make a sound, yes...when you write them like this, it is a sound that time can't erase. *Hug*

icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

4 posted 2004-01-11 07:48 PM

You folks are kind. Thank you.

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

5 posted 2004-01-15 01:32 PM

"I can laugh
about my heart and how it found the will
to beat around the dagger buried deep,
still set where placed so long ago"

hmmmmmmmm....so well written...and so painful to read..

"sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.."
~Dido~

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

6 posted 2004-01-15 01:42 PM

At this moment I can neither speak for the lump in my throat...
nor can I see the screen...through my tears.
But when I recover...please know..
my hand is touching the screen where your words are placed.
Remarkable piece of work m'friend.
~Heart hugs~

In the midst of winter..
I found there lives within me,
an invincible summer.

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

7 posted 2004-01-15 02:08 PM

not sure I have any words to do justice to this...
so I'll say I read it, and that it moved me and leave it there

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

8 posted 2004-01-15 02:13 PM

I so appreciate how you lay out
your poetic thoughts,

each one taking its own turn
in layering the depth
of what,
and how,
and why
you want to leave the reader
wanting more.

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

9 posted 2004-01-15 02:22 PM

icebox
You have birthed an epopee, for all to see.

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-29

Posts 7115
South Africa

10 posted 2004-01-15 04:09 PM

Icebox, you are a master and I humbly bow!

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

11 posted 2004-01-15 11:51 PM

This is pure and passionate poetry....icebox~

What a writer you are!!!

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

12 posted 2004-01-16 12:25 PM

it goes beyond the rim of disappointment
understanding if I talk with you today,
and thread the thoughts carefully within a conversation
we might have had yesterday,
or are yet to have tomorrow,
that there is hope but the slightest chance
you might recall my name.

Poet, Sir, I don't have words to explain how deeply this wonderful work of poetry has touched my heart. It is so sad, yet so beautiful that I found myself holding my breath while I was reading. Emotion seemed to be dripping from the page. This is breathtakingly beautiful.

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

13 posted 2004-01-16 01:06 AM

You always have left me simply in awe of your expression. This time, no words suffice. All I can say is that this one has touched me more deeply than any other and is my favorite of yours so far.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

14 posted 2004-01-16 03:43 AM

the words just fell out of my mouth and rolled away

J.Samm
Member

since 2004-01-12

Posts 415
Iloilo City, Philippines

15 posted 2004-01-16 04:48 AM

so sad, yet so hopeful...proves that only true love never gives up

choshi
Senior Member

since 2004-01-01

Posts 1184
New York

16 posted 2004-01-16 06:51 AM

poignant, cuts to the bone...Such a read ~C

Dr.Moose1
Member Elite

since 1999-09-05

Posts 3448
Bewilderment , USA

17 posted 2004-01-16 10:19 PM

icebox,
Somehow ,I get the impression, that this wasn't written, as much as it was ripped out of you. That said, be well.
Doc

Paul Wilson

Member Elite

since 2002-07-07

Posts 4711
United States

18 posted 2004-01-17 01:01 PM

icebox...Touching write. It felt like I was intruding on you soul while reading...Paul

"To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you"

NewEnglandlazurlu
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-01-04

Posts 7470
A Mountain Paradise

19 posted 2004-01-17 01:34 PM

Speechless! You are a master poet!

Hugs to you dear man...Marti

I take no credit for my poems. Although I write them, I feel
more like I transcribe them. It's just a matter of listening.

icebox
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 4383
in the shadows

20 posted 2004-01-17 03:44 PM

Thank you all, old friends and new, for your kind thoughts, for reading my poem and especially for taking the time to tell me.

This was not birthed easily and I appreciate being able to share it here.

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