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Open Poetry #30
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LongJohn The Sailor, Special Forces
| Open Poetry #30 |
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LongJohn The Sailor, Special Forces |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
When LongJohn landed in Vietnam, He hardly got to see Saigon, They lined them up and called the role, Off he went on long patrol. Capt. Toe called a halt that night, LongJohn went on, (he ain't too bright) Toe yelled "Sheep", LongJohn looked back, That stopped LongJohn in his tracks. Private LongJohn-"La-trine Queen" Keeps our bathrooms sparkling clean, Then he makes chow for all of us, With a taste like a seat on a cross-town bus. (Washes his hands we think-really can't tell, he always stinks) A couple of the fellas were tellin' jokes, A few of the guys started to smoke, I took a whiff as the cloud rolled bye My head went up like an infield fly I may be crazy but I think not, If I'm not mistaken, I smell pot, But who'd have pot in Vietnam? (Everyone looked at Old LongJohn). Now John was wired like a radio Wasn't quite sure which way to go, He was stumblin' around in the moonlit haze Met another fella in pink P.J's He said "What in the world you doin' here? Ain't your name Balladeer?" Balladeer said: "You know my name? Didn't realize I had such fame. I was under a habit of an ugly nun Then found out her name was "John" He passed some gas That was so damn bad, I came outta hiding And I got bagged. The MP's said, "You're ours my son" Cut my hair-gave me this gun, Gave me orders and printed my fingers, So I changed my name to Balladeer Klinger. LongJohn said "Just kiss me 'Deer' That's our ticket outta here." They kissed and hugged-John wouldn't let-go, Lived happily-ever-after in South Frisco. |
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| © Copyright 2004 Toerag - All Rights Reserved | |||
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
YOU ARE SCUM!!!!! Ladies! Don't believe a word of this poem! I told you all that Toerag was a scoundrel and a scalawag! OMG - This is horrible. |
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Terrina Member
since 2003-12-31
Posts 166California |
One day I'll get it. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
I'm guessing they went on to work undercover together as well... lol good one Toe... but I have a question.. when Capt Toe hollered sheep, why did Lng Jhn stop and look back? Figured he's a been on the run about then cause of what those sheep did to him when he and Deer were in Australia.. wasn't them chasing the sheep way I heard the story.. them rams took a liking to those two and near killed em both... |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
pretty funny...I do think Pete, my once SO, would get a kick out of these... I am still reading those I have missed...you should number them so I know in what order to read. ~still smiling~ M |
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Youngatheart Member
since 2003-12-30
Posts 333 |
This is great! |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
ROFL... I think you managed to tie all the story lines together in this one... quite a feat! *G* Now your "feet" had better be in motion before they have a chance to retaliate! *G* |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Ohhhh you guys! That was an interesting out, Toeray! Klinger, good one! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Hey, Toe, was that special forces or special farces? LOL! You made a major blunder here. There is not a colonel of truth in these words and it is general knowledge that my army days were private! Captain Toerag!! now THAT's the best laugh in the poem! I heard your stripes were attached with velcro to make 'em easier to tear off every week or so. At least I wuz a brig-a-Deer!  (but ya done real good with this one, wac) |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands |
Reading this was a really good start of this beautiful day. Thank you Toe Titia Like scattered leaves...my words will flow |
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