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Open Poetry #30
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Allysa
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

0 posted 2003-12-08 10:30 PM


Redish brown and captured
it's just me holding my soul
in the palm of my hand-

waiting for someone to take it,
love it, or perhaps smear it
across the wall of the room
I have invented solely for the purpose
of shutting everyone out.

Don't worry about it when you
wait for me to whisper sweet things
in the night the voices call to you-

you say you can feel my pain
but if you did, you would've answered
the phone the last two times I called,
knowing that it was, in fact,
bad decision making time yet again.

It's too bad, really, because
that means that it's just me left
to take myself by the hand-

lead me away from the shadows
take my pain away from me
before it captures the part of me
that you so desperately claim to love.
Help me to leave it all behind.

I dare you.

Or will you chose to pack it up
and follow the crowd
leaving just me behind

to pick up the pieces of the mess
you helped to make of me
and throw them over the bridge,
watching as they fade away
and die with the water.

© Copyright 2003 Allysa - All Rights Reserved
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
1 posted 2003-12-08 11:14 PM


NIce writing...James
Saunni
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777
West Virginia
2 posted 2003-12-08 11:44 PM


I read this and then read it again! Certainly a very moving write and one I can relate so well. It's just that you said it better then I ever could.

Sauni:)The Only Time I See The Sun Is When I'm Within That Vanilla Breeze.The Only Time I'm One With The Sun Is When He Shelters Me From The Rain.

SuperGlueRyan
Junior Member
since 2003-06-16
Posts 45
Possum Kingdom
3 posted 2003-12-09 02:21 AM


I like this piece of writing. As much as those who care about you want to be there for you at all times it is impossible. Perhaps that person needs a more moble piece of telephonery. I feel very sad that the person in question has made a shattered mess of your life.

~Ryan

Allysa
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden
4 posted 2003-12-09 12:52 PM


James, thanks.  

Saunni:  Also thanks.  Actually, thanks much.  This makes me feel glad that I got to write that down, because someone relates to it.

Ryan: She never asked him to be there for her all the time, just for him to try to not just disappear, as she felt that he was and since he has done this before, she was scared.  Yes, perhaps.  

Oh, and you haven't made a shattered mess of my life.

SuperGlueRyan
Junior Member
since 2003-06-16
Posts 45
Possum Kingdom
5 posted 2003-12-11 03:38 AM


Don't be afraid. So long as one is true, there will always be someone there for you.
WannabePoet
Member
since 2003-12-10
Posts 62
New York USA
6 posted 2003-12-11 06:06 AM


Excellent emotional piece. Your words take the reader into your soul.  I hope you get all your heart desires from the one you love.
Allysa
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden
7 posted 2003-12-12 03:04 PM


Ryan: does that mean you'll always be there for me?

And thanks, all, for the replies.

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