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Open Poetry #30

Rhythm

Astro
Member

since 2003-01-08

Posts 69
Ca.

0 posted 2003-12-02 08:11 PM

Rhythm

Rhythm?
Never had much use for it
-- Maybe ‘cause I’m white.
I am adept at using simple syllables,
But I guess that isn’t right.
I should pair words like alliterate
With masturbate – sorry, Freudian slip,
But the words are multi-syllabic
And that makes my rhythm more hip.

There’s the speaking voice, too.
What I mean is, do I deliver the words
With the passion of birds
Who sing for the dawn’s red hue?
Of course, that’s not the best example
As birds are quite simple, and their song
Is awkward and random.
I should speak more like a jackhammer
Whose tandem handles rock and sway
With a rhythm that never gives way
And I can pound my meaning into
The mental ground of a nation weaned on
Rhythm.

Sight is an always awful beginning

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2003-12-02 08:57 PM

ROTFL. This is funny, and has its own unique rhythm. LOL at the humorous alliteration.

Masked Intruder

Moderator

Senior Member

since 1999-05-23

Posts 1231
Near golden sunsets

2 posted 2003-12-03 02:16 PM

Another really great write!

'Never had much use for it
- Maybe 'cause I'm white'

LOL, I can relate to that line so well. I'm a strict free verser, myself, in writing, dancing, and everything else.

Midnitesun is very right in noting the humor you use; quite excellently done throughout!

-*-*-

Bad monkey.

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