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Open Poetry #30
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Copperbell
Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956


0 posted 2003-11-25 09:22 PM


I'm not sure if this qualifies as a poem - but I thought I would share it anyway.

The painter holds his brush
Trying to capture the golden strands of her hair.
He lifts his brush, but wait-
she grimaces.Her stomach pains
And the baby that was once due
Is being lost.

As she arrives at the hospital
She sees her face in the glass
And all there is - is pain
All her hope is lost.

To the painter she is lovely
But he didn't see her soul.

He didn't see her heart
Because he only saw her shell.

Still, she is lovely;
And he doesn't see the truth even though he is right.

He so loves to look at beauty...
But if he would look past her beauty
He would find something more beautiful -

Herself

© Copyright 2003 Copperbell - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
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Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2003-11-25 10:07 PM


Of course it's poetry!
How sad, that when someone can only see the exterior. Maybe your artist needs to deepen his palette, see more hues.

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
2 posted 2003-11-25 10:07 PM


Indeed it does,  achingly beautiful....


Lauren~


I had a dream last night
you came to me on silver wings of light
I flew away with you in painted sky
Was it real
Is it what you see,touch or feel



[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (11-25-2003 10:09 PM).]

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
3 posted 2003-11-25 10:10 PM


isn't that the truth!
This just happens too much, and sadly I think we all fall that route at times
This is beautiful

Always, Alyssa

He was a man of sorrows
...I am a girl of tears.
(Blink, Breathe, Stand, Fight)

Copperbell
Senior Member
since 2003-11-08
Posts 956

4 posted 2003-11-25 11:21 PM


Midnitesun - I think its so easy in today's culture to see only exterior - I'm lucky because my "painter" sees me

Greeneyes and GG - thanks for your kind words

I wish people could see each other

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-11-26 04:03 AM


indeed, poetry
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

6 posted 2003-11-26 07:03 AM


beauty is in the eyes and heart of the beholder and rings out through the land...with all kinds of wisdom which beholds everything as a brand new experience, holding the breast of excitement
Loving is seeing the depth of the soul of someone, not just for the good, but loveing the imperfections as well, being mature enough to withstand the bumps in any road...going the distance...realizing, he has the best in the entire world...I believe two people are made for each other...and complimented so...by each others experiences and wisdom, if they are open to the fine culinary of realizing they are and always will be like a child learning.

Beautifully written...thank you for sharing

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