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Open Poetry #29
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Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154


0 posted 2003-11-22 10:59 PM



Angel dance (a Villanelle)

On angel wings we waltz divine
As we dance to the midnight moon
Within his glance a light does shine


Two beating hearts do now entwine
Wrapped in a sweet cocoon
On angel wings we waltz divine

As he touched his hand to mine
My soul began to swoon
Within his glance a light does shine

As we are dancing on cloud nine
A balladeer starts to croon
On angel wings we waltz divine

Commit my love unto his shrine
Though others may say too soon
Within his glance a light does shine

Deep in his eyes a sweet life line
The choir does sing in tune
On angel wings we waltz divine
Within his glance a light does shine

© Copyright 2003 Margot Hill - All Rights Reserved
Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
1 posted 2003-11-22 11:02 PM


I enjoyed this. Villanelles are one of my favorite forms, but they make me tear my hair out when I try writing them.  It's so hard to make the third line sound as if it naturally falls.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

2 posted 2003-11-22 11:05 PM


Now this is a work of art!  I have never tried to write a villanelle, and it doesn't look easy, but yours just waltzed across the page...  ~K~
Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
3 posted 2003-11-22 11:06 PM


What a beautiful piece of art....I look forward to more....

Welcome to Passions...We are glad you are here....Please check your email for a special greeting.....
Greeneyes~

I had a dream last night
you came to me on silver wings of light
I flew away with you in painted sky
Was it real
Is it what you see,touch or feel

Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154

4 posted 2003-11-22 11:09 PM


Nan,

Thank you very much, it is a difficult form for me to read smoothly but I enjoyed trying to get it to work.

Margot

Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154

5 posted 2003-11-22 11:15 PM


Kahlil & Greeneyes,

Thank you both very much. I signup right before the boards crashed and got distracted. I hope to be posting more now that I've rediscovered this forum.

Margot

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
6 posted 2003-11-22 11:28 PM


Welcome to Passions, Margot! You started off with a beauty! I'm with Pilgrimage, I love villanelles, but I'm nearly bald by the time I finish writing one! lol

You did a wonderful job writing yours!

Warm, welcoming hugs,
Earth Angel

Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154

7 posted 2003-11-22 11:31 PM


Earth Angel,

Thank you very much for the compliment and the welcome.

Margot

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
8 posted 2003-11-22 11:44 PM


Welcome! I enjoyed this. Even after being here two years, I haven't dared attempt this structured style.
Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154

9 posted 2003-11-22 11:52 PM


Midnitesun,

Thank you very much

Margot

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
10 posted 2003-11-23 02:27 AM


Enjoyed...James
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
11 posted 2003-11-23 03:56 AM


BRAVO!
Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154

12 posted 2003-11-23 07:21 AM


James & passing shadows

Thank you both very much

Margot

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
13 posted 2003-11-23 09:11 AM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS!
Very very beautiful entrance presentation.
I look forward to more of your work.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~I've loved you forever, in lifetimes before~

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
14 posted 2003-11-23 09:50 AM


Yes, nice accomplishment.  For one can
struggle with the lines.  You have done
very well.  Welcome to Passions.

Margot
Member
since 2003-10-04
Posts 154

15 posted 2003-11-23 11:00 AM


Nancy & Magnus,

Thank you very much

Margot

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