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Open Poetry #29
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The Image ( masked challenge)
| Open Poetry #29 |
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The Image ( masked challenge) |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines 
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Slight of build strong in shoulder I watched his every movement. His eyes intriguing. My mind remembering the past, when all I could think of was his touch, wanting to mirror his smile in greet knowing what pains lay behind yet give him a look of know, an endless meaning of caring when Fall begins its leafing and the wind leans heavily upon my soul naked but for the thoughts of him as I watch the limbs come down a love once held upon those teasing words to caress a lost me. Those shoulders pressed against the wall holding the tenseness of a life alone wanted by me, needed by me as I watch the movements of his hand plying drink to lips, softened once by my own. He caught my eye as he did before. And once again I tempt his shadow passing by the eyes of blue letting them rest upon what sears... if only letting them study a form of desire wishing a taste of what is his to share in... what is mine. M "Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more, it is willing to see less." (Will Moss) [This message has been edited by nakdthoughts (11-16-2003 02:09 PM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Wynter Bliss - All Rights Reserved | |||
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
I am no good at guessing styles, though I like the idea of trying to write as another. No matter, this is great writing, clear, strong and true. Thank you for sharing it. |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
thank you for reading..I may have done the style of the poet a disservice.. *s M |
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garysgirl  
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Maureen, I'm not good at guessing either. The words sound a lot like Littlewing, but the style of the placement of the words looks like Icebox. No matter who it is, it's good writing.  Hugs  Ethel |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Reads a lot like Dark Stranger.....  enjoyed the words M Lauren~ i carry your heart with me |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
see Ethel  it is neither of them...oh well. I triedM |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Maureen, this is lovely. Abit like my sister Enchantress's work, but I am not sure. Whoever it is supposed to be similar to, you have made them proud for certain. hugs,Chris Let your life lightly dance on the edges of Time like dew on the tip of a leaf. -Tagore |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Oh no, Maureen...It's not you, it's me. I'm just not good at guessing things. |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Lauren I believe if it was DS..it would have to be a bit more sensual It's funny Chris because I used this poet's poem line by line, replacing my thoughts...with his/hers ( don't wish to give it away) Maybe they will recognize it themselves. And Ethel, it isn't you...I just picked a poet who can write many ways..but I thought I was picking up on the story line of watching in a bar...maybe that will help in reflecting. hugs M |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Maureen, I read it over a couple of times again... Is it Capt. Ron? It actually does sound more like him than it does Sue. |
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Wind
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981 |
I say Cpat....or Serenity. they have similar styles though. hmmm What about China? Have you seen the Great Wall? |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
this reminds me of Michele, Miss Inked |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
Ethel...thank you again for your attempts at knowing. Wind nice to see you here and Sue, thank you for your response. If I was mimicking Michele, that would be a great accomplishment. M |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
OMG who is it, I am dying here it has to be one I do not know (forgive me, if I do) xxoo |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
It is in wranx's list in the challenge forum... M |
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EvocativeVerse2 Senior Member
since 2003-09-10
Posts 1279 |
Hi nakdthoughts...love this piece. Who is it? Mmm most of the writers on wranx's list I have not read. I tend to stick with the people I read daily...even if I do not always leave a comment on their work. My honest guess would be cpat. It does not matter whether my guess is correct or not...in truth all that matters is you have written a wonderful verse here. Well done! Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history! |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
and your honest guess is correct...I patterned it off of his "Reflections In Glass" poem M |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Slight of build strong in shoulder I watched his every movement. His eyes intriguing. My mind remembering the past, when all I could think of was his touch, wanting to mirror his smile in greet knowing what pains lay behind yet give him a look of know, an endless meaning of caring when Fall begins its leafing and the wind leans heavily upon my soul naked but for the thoughts of him as I watch the limbs come down a love once held upon those teasing words to caress a lost me. Those shoulders pressed against the wall holding the tenseness of a life alone wanted by me, needed by me as I watch the movements of his hand plying drink to lips, softened once by my own. He caught my eye as he did before. And once again I tempt his shadow passing by the eyes of blue letting them rest upon what sears... if only letting them study a form of desire wishing a taste of what is his to share in... what is mine. ......................................... One awakens with eyes that have not yet shaken sleeps gauze from themselves and see in shadowed blur the softer edges glaze but in moments the smell of fresh scrubbed skin reminded me the mirror holds you with more warmth than I I used to grow restless with the sound of shower as I thought of the water touching in slow runnelled trace places my mind would have hands now I fade with what we were obscured fog on glass dimming reflections making it impossible to view what once I held close as the beauty of you |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
lovely, Mr C. I have been waiting to see if you recognized a bit of you in my words... You always could challenge the best in me. M |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
I'm far easier to mimic Ms M..than many who write here... and thought you did quite well.. from now on, I think I'll let you and Ed write for me..you both do it better than me.. lol Now turn soft this the back of palm against cheek my own hand my own face all I touch here this the day rain falls with loud syncopated clatter on the metal above while wondering as I was did someone touch yours tracing lines along jaw to hush lips then beg their own touched with yours? I know the calloused side and with it know there is no reason to ask myself these the things of memory still my own hand lingers along my jaw and I remember you once cared |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
awww...you do fine just as you are...you don't need anyone to "copy" your style. Thanks for the "words" M |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
LOL... you are kind.... |
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