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Open Poetry #29
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought

0 posted 2003-10-17 06:39 AM



its coming close again
to the day October sun sprang through
to when i whispered bye to you...
and told you it was okay if you left me here
alone.

The tears that flood my pulsing heart
Are steady as I fall apart.

Your fragile hand was limp in mine
Death rattle was a simple sign.

and now your gone,
so i'm alone.
i've changed my mind,
i need you home.

Because the day is coming close again
And only you
Can make me feel okay.

- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

© Copyright 2003 GG - All Rights Reserved
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
1 posted 2003-10-17 06:44 AM


It's always amazing how poets can create such beauty out of sadness by using unique images and language.
I enjoyed the melancholy theme of this piece.
Nicely done.

Eric

Ain't doin nothin at all
Just answerin the call
Kinda driftin away from it all~~~~~

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
2 posted 2003-10-17 07:16 AM


Alyssa, if this was a personal loss, I am sending you loving hugs. If this was merely poetry, I am still sending you loving hugs for it was beautiful and touched my heart.


Linda

angelblueyes
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148
Oklahoma
3 posted 2003-10-17 12:35 PM


This touched my heart and am sending you many healing hugs.
Crystal

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
4 posted 2003-10-17 02:29 PM


ethome,
I don't know how unique my images were... but thankyou. glad you enjoyed...

Linda,
This was my grandma... my best friend and mother all my life... wrapped in one. Thank you, for the reply, and the hugs...

angelblueyes,
thank you... good to have a hug and reply...

Always, Alyssa

- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-10-18 03:33 AM


Alyssa, you always touch my heart softly enough to break it

love to you

eor
Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959
blues & greys
6 posted 2003-10-18 03:43 AM


this made me really sad, i can only imagine if this really happened to you

"For those who understand you, no explanation is necessary. For those who don't, none is possible."

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
7 posted 2003-10-18 05:10 AM


Dixie,
I live... with a broken heart. And that is life, with every smile, every laugh, and every tear, the heart is broken, and I bleed a little more. If you can actually feel that.. then I'm sorry, because I wouldn't wish it to even he whom I hate. thank you

eor,
yea bro, it was pretty bad, still is. Makes for easy poetry though... just hard on the heart. Thank you  

Always, Alyssa


- And so it was that time stood still -
     (blink, breathe, stand, fight)

[This message has been edited by GG (10-18-2003 07:44 AM).]

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
8 posted 2003-10-18 06:57 AM


Alyssa,

I am loving how you write...

keep posting!

Susan

SharaRose
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~
9 posted 2003-10-18 09:54 AM


:'( Hurtful place to be. Sorry for your pain.
Love,
Terri~

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