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Open Poetry #29
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suthern
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana

0 posted 2003-10-12 07:41 PM


I Hate My ISP

For private pain, I'm in a public place
In spite of all efforts, I can't erase
The tears that erupt to slide down my face
As I read these words on the screen

If only I'd been home, safely alone
As my skin's peeled back to reveal bleached bone
I wish acting skills were something I'd honed
But I'm lacking that sphinx-faced gene

I feel invisible, but that can't be
Too many people are looking at me
They're wondering what it is that I see
That has me here falling apart

I endeavor to stop this flood of eye
But must have uttered some whimper or cry
To "Ma'am, are you all right?" I smile my lie
"Why yes, of course... who needs a heart?"

[This message has been edited by suthern (10-12-2003 07:43 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 suthern - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2003-10-12 07:57 PM


Oh, this write has the feel of real pain.
Indeed, who needs a heart?
Let's go shopping again soon.
My cupboard is empty.

Saunni
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777
West Virginia
2 posted 2003-10-12 08:39 PM


Wow, this blew me away! Though, I am sorry you hurt! You don't have to hide it here. Feel free to email me if you need anything

Sauni:)The Only Time I See The Sun Is When I'm Within That Vanilla Breeze.The Only Time I'm One With The Sun Is When He Shelters Me From The Rain.

allamericanjoe
Member
since 2003-10-02
Posts 116
Iredell county, NC
3 posted 2003-10-12 08:40 PM


We all have to fall apart sometimes.  It's what makes us realize how it is that we go back together, it keeps us human.  I hope your pain is not long suffered.  You have friends here at least!  We suffer with you through your beautifully written words.  Burdens are so much lighter when you have someone to help you carry them.  Thank you for sharing your emotions with us.

"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time"  ~James taylor~

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
4 posted 2003-10-12 08:42 PM


Oh my gosh gal....this just aches.
I do hope you'll be okay.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile~

PsychoticBunni
Member
since 2003-10-03
Posts 162
Mythical Atlantis
5 posted 2003-10-12 08:48 PM


my deepest condolences. you express perfectly what it is to feel pain. If you express it this well then you must not have lost your mind from whatever loss you've suffered. A bright side to look at in your turmoil

Meg

Meg- And the Texan pushed the Mexican out of the plane and screamed, "Long live the ALAMO!!!!!!!!!"

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
6 posted 2003-10-12 09:01 PM


suthern,
Good write, one of your best.


Magnus
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since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
7 posted 2003-10-12 09:02 PM


Ok Suthern,  there are obvious greener
pastures on the other side of your computer
screen.  I hope you are well.  You very
nicely expressed suffering and I can only
hope you are feelin' ok...

Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
8 posted 2003-10-12 09:08 PM


Suthern beloved one, do you realise you made me cry too beloved? The wonder of your writing is that which moves the soul, and you do, always. Feel my hand reaching across to touch you, as you have touched me, warm gentle and loving as are you beloved heart.

There are times, and this is one of them when I wonder where I would be if I hadn’t walked through the blue door all that time ago. I do know I would be poorer in spirit and certainly I wouldn’t know the glory of your soul, which always blesses me. Thank you for the joy you bring into my life.

Love you lady always

Love you always
and forever
Mushy


Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds
but I can face the future with courage brave and bold

Footprints In My Heart
Kethry

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
9 posted 2003-10-12 09:53 PM


The lion needed a heart - but not you - Yours is fully intact and very real... Just keep on caring, m'friend - It's all you know how to do...
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
10 posted 2003-10-12 10:06 PM


Suthern...It's far better to be able to feel and express emotion then hold it inside.  I sure do understand this.  
Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
11 posted 2003-10-12 10:07 PM


Beautifully done.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Edder
Senior Member
since 2003-04-02
Posts 671

12 posted 2003-10-12 11:11 PM


Sweet Suthern, if I could I'd surely give you a hug! You obviously read as you write...with your heart!
Ratleader
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Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
13 posted 2003-10-13 09:31 AM


I'm wondering too -- makes me hurt for you Laura-girl.... This poem so good that if it were any less sad I'd say that I wish I wrote it. Hope you get both a better situation and a new ISP!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Bonnie j
Senior Member
since 2003-06-27
Posts 1588
Ohio
14 posted 2003-10-13 09:41 AM


Talk about falling apart. One time on the bus something was said and it touched my heart and I cried all the way into town.
We cry when in pain, we cry in sorrow, we cry in happiness, we cry when something so beautiful touches our heart with profound beauty.
If you are filled with sadness I will share my tissue box with you and we'll cry together.
Sending a great big hug from Ohio.
Love Bon-Bon

suthern
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
15 posted 2003-10-13 10:46 AM


Midnitesun: To know you’d be brave enough to risk writing with me AGAIN puts a smile into my cupboard… I do thank you! *S*

Saunni: That is so kind of you… I thank you very much! *S*

Allamericanjoe: Yes… I do have friends here… and they are dear. *S* Thank you very much!

Enchantress: Me, too. *S* Thank you very much! *S*

PsychoticBunni: I love your name! *S* And LOL @ lost mind… those hurt less than lost hearts. *S* Thank you!

Seymour: Thank you, my friend. *S*

Magnus: Not yet… I just moved my crying spree to the office… another public place where tears are inappropriate. *S* Thank you very much! *S*

Marsha: There are times I forget the blue door is on a hinge… and get slapped in the face. *S* But it brought me you… just as it brought others I love into my life… so I am ever grateful. *S* Thank you!

Nan: Yes’m… that’s the truth. *S* Thank you so very much! *S*

Martie: At the moment, I’d beg to differ… but thank you! *S*

Pilgrimage: Thank you very much! *S*

Edder: I’d gladly take it. *S* Thank you very much! *S*

Ratleader: Or at least learn to deal better with both? *S* Thank you so much, my friend… I didn’t mean to make others hurt along with me. *S*

Bonnie: Better bring an extra box… I should have run dry by now, but the drips keep coming! *S* Thank you very much! *S*

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
16 posted 2003-10-13 11:01 AM



Hey suthern.  When are you going
to give me a chance?  Hugs...

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
17 posted 2003-10-13 12:01 PM


Awww, this is so sad!  Hoping for a brighter day today for you!


Corinne

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

18 posted 2003-10-13 03:02 PM


hmmmmmmm....
me thinks you need a hug more than a reply....
will a mothy heart-hug do?



QjQ
Member Elite
since 2003-04-18
Posts 3756
U.S.A.
19 posted 2003-10-13 08:19 PM


hugs,,,,,

                                                                                   

James_A_Fraser
Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972
Out Making Anticlines
20 posted 2003-10-14 09:11 AM


I know this feeling, though not in this way. Some of the most emotion-packed events that happen for me -- up and down both -- are right out in public with no place to hide. There are times I would pay a hundred dollars to be able to close a door and be private.

You're one of the strongest poets in this group, and it really shows here.



~~J

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
21 posted 2003-10-14 09:18 AM


Suthern, you ache so beautifully! Your soul is guiless and wide open. No one could read this and not feel compassion and love for you.

Sending a rainbow of healing lights and a warm, loving embrace,
EA

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
22 posted 2003-10-14 12:01 PM


ahhhhhh... the ache...

you wrote it well...

hugs and regards
sudhir

Mysteria
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British Columbia, Canada
23 posted 2003-10-14 12:41 PM


Oh my! I almost don't want to say how well you wrote this, but I have to.  Take care.
jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

24 posted 2003-10-14 02:08 PM


*long deep breath* this is too incredible to be anything but real, and so painfilled that it makes me cry......wow lady...hugs and love from your friend
Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
25 posted 2003-10-14 04:25 PM




(big angel hugs) Oh Suthern, I hope everything is alright as you sound so troubled and hurt, sweet friend! (sad sigh) It hurts me too to know of those who speak such harmful words to another and fail to forgive or appreciate otherwise, I send angel healing hugs your way, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Suthern, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
26 posted 2003-10-15 10:36 AM


Sunshine: If it’s mine to give, it’s yours. *S* Thank you! *S*

Corinne: Hopes are always good… thank you! *S*

JM: I don’t ever turn down an offer like that… thank you! *S*

QjQ: Thank you! *S*

Jamie: I would have sold my soul… though I might have had more luck paying the hundred dollars… no takers for a shattered soul. *S* On another emotional note… Your kind opinion isn’t one I agree with… but that won’t keep me from treasuring the comment. *S* Thank you so much! *S*

EA: Then I need to make sure it’s addressed properly… right? *S* Thank you so much, kind lady… just reading your words makes me smile. *S*

Sudhir: I thank you very much. *S*

Mysteria: You said it well… thank you! *S*

jellybeans: Yes… imagination’s on vacation. *S* Thank you, my friend… I love you!

M’toe: Some words don’t mean to harm… the hurt is in their truth… and my fears. *S*  Thank you so much! *S*

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
27 posted 2003-10-18 01:17 PM


Love your take and honest reaction to what you were seeing on the screen.

Been there so many times and it is hard
to conceal the overwelming flood of emotion.

But you know without a heart you never would have felt that way in the first place.  Hugs suthern one~

Good answer though, who needs it when it only brings you pain.  

suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
28 posted 2003-10-19 06:39 PM


Sometimes those hearts make you wish you'd brought a bag to cover your head. *S* Thank you so much, sweet lady. *S*
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