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Open Poetry #29
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bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
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0 posted 2003-10-10 12:59 PM



Is love
a drugged permutation
of hate?

An easy calm
punctuating
ocean silence?

Once the stillness
is disrupted,
faces wavered,

do love and hate
truly share
a mingled length?

Glass-lined bay,
let's not get too
far down the shore.

Sometimes I wonder
why the fragments
come in lightly.

Soft as ribbons,
shamed as words
finding sleep.

Are we but shells --
twin polished bones --
upon this beach?

© Copyright 2003 MPC - All Rights Reserved
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

1 posted 2003-10-10 01:14 PM


Mikey.... you know you are one of my favorites dude..and the added dimensions you have added to your writing of late..only make you more so..


Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
2 posted 2003-10-10 01:14 PM


"Are we but shells --
twin polished bones --
upon this beach?"

Yes, but we weren't when we started...

Nice job!

Susan

bsquirrel
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3 posted 2003-10-10 05:01 PM


Thank you both for your comments
and your insights.

serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

4 posted 2003-10-11 03:10 PM


I loved the shell and bone reference at the end. Rumor has it I think too much but...grin...the shell as a protective covering of the vulnerable, and the bone implicating strength particularly illustrastes the complexity of the "thing called love" and furthers your analogy of love and hate.

(and this is WAY off the path, but it did dawn on me too that both shell and bone are believed to have medicinal/magickal properties and have been known to have been used as a means of currency.)

But then again, there is this caution within the work:

"Glass-lined bay,
let's not get too
far down the shore."



It's true. I DO think too much.

Hugs and



Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
5 posted 2003-10-11 03:25 PM




(sigh) Perhaps, but love is also a sedimentary grain, that only comes cohesive again with the pearls and agate and evolves into something new and exclusive! (big hugggsssss) This is wonderfully provoking, sweet friend, God Bless You, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Michael, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

Wind
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Member Elite
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

6 posted 2003-10-11 06:48 PM


ya ever wonder my there aren't millions of little glass shards on the beach to cut your feet up?

then again, loving those last lines mikey

me likes bones...shiney bones

What about China? Have you seen the Great Wall?
All walls are great, if the roof doesn't fall.
-yorke/bjork

garysgirl
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since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
7 posted 2003-10-12 12:57 PM


Mike, love does cut sometimes...just as shells do, if one doesn't tread carefully on the beach.
But, hate cuts even worse.......

A very thought-provoking poem, Mike. I enjoyed...
Hugs  
Ethel

Alwye
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Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
8 posted 2003-10-12 09:04 PM


hm, this kind of reminds me of Amy Clampitt's poem "Beach Glass"....thats a good one, as is your poem.  I especially liked the first verse.  Exellent writing, you always make me think a bit. Which is a good thing.  Keep it up!

~*Krista Lee Knutson*~

We are, each of us angels with only one wing; and we can only fly by embracing one another.
--Luciano De Crescenzo

PsychoticBunni
Member
since 2003-10-03
Posts 162
Mythical Atlantis
9 posted 2003-10-12 09:07 PM


again heavy. this really makes me think. are we just twisted beings to be played with like a child's toy?? i hope not.

Meg- And the Texan pushed the Mexican out of the plane and screamed, "Long live the ALAMO!!!!!!!!!"

Local Parasite
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Transylconia, Winnipeg
10 posted 2003-10-12 09:20 PM


Mhm... first of all, the title, really sets the scene for the poem perfectly.  It's a bit overdone, sure, but not so much that I'd call it cliche, exactly.  I think it's appropriate, because of the specific imagery you incorporate towards the end.  Overall it works out very nicely.  

As for the subject matter, well, I too find myself questioning the property of love quite a bit.  I think Dante said the same thing, in his Purgatorio, about how all existent sin is just immoderate love... including wrath, or "hate", which is just misdirected love.

That aside, you've breathed new life into this ages-old argument... I love it when these things are revisited.  It's great poetry, Mike...

Parasite

Faith is a fine invention
When gentlemen can see
But microscopes are prudent
In an emergency.
~~~Emily Dickinson

bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

11 posted 2003-10-20 12:46 PM


Thanks for your responses. I'd give each of you an individual nod and thanks, but I'm pretty tired from this week. So just know, all of you, how much I appreciate your replies.

Mike

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