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Open Poetry #29
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Cpat Hair
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since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2003-10-09 02:44 PM


In contrast
Shadows deepen the line of your throat
And my words hang
Halfway in my own as I am unable
To utter these hard syllables
Against such a background
Of grey tones that paint you here
Half lit in evening
           With touches of last wave reflected sun
Cascading on the curve of your back
Then revealing a half turned smile
Of far off musing
                              Content perhaps
To ponder the ending day.

Color would not do you justice here
      For there is too much said in the form
Far more in the absence
                                         Detail begs
That would be refused to the eye
If the palette broadened to reds or blues

When you move
                            The curves of you
Bend the light and leave me in gasp
Of one more breath to inhale
All I see
                  And know all you don’t say
Is in your own way being kind

Adams would approve
              This landscape

Yet I would capture it not as he
But instead
                    Hold it in my head
To develop later
                           In the dark of my heart


© Copyright 2003 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2003-10-09 02:56 PM



Ansel would approve of the poem, too...

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2003-10-09 07:01 PM


In contrast
Shadows deepen the line of your throat
And my words hang
Halfway in my own as I am unable
To utter these hard syllables
Against such a background
Of grey tones that paint you here
Half lit in evening
           With touches of last wave reflected sun
Cascading on the curve of your back
Then revealing a half turned smile
Of far off musing
                              Content perhaps
To ponder the ending day.

================================


*touching the screen*
good Lord I love your poetry.

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

3 posted 2003-10-09 07:05 PM


Sunshine... I doubt it..but thank you

Mothy one... ( touching screen) what poetry hun?    It's all a bar trick I told you...


Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California
4 posted 2003-10-09 07:21 PM


Ron...I think you captured it perfectly!  
Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
5 posted 2003-10-09 07:23 PM


So good, Ron...I will be forever in awe of your work.  You know, everytime time I read you, I wonder...wonder how you do it so well every time, every word.  

Patricia

Wind
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since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

6 posted 2003-10-09 07:25 PM


you are one of the best, indeed...ya just need to worry less....

about other people I mean...

ugh...yanno what I mean..your a genius, lets put it that way

And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots!"
-Tool

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

7 posted 2003-10-09 07:32 PM


Martie... thank you my friend.. but it is never perfect..only an illusion of passing.. and one in each telling becomes something slightly different..but then..it always is, filled with the subtle differences isn't it?

Patricia.. I actually grinned at your reply.. I thank you sincerely for the kind words.... but dear lady, I am not every word perfect every time.. all too aften I am juxtaposed on idea and actual words.. but am honored you would say such a nice thing..


Liz... come here you human! lol... ok...ok..all I was going to do was hug you for saying such nice things.... no need to throw that koolaid at me..
genius...no... but thank you dear for saying nice things...

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
8 posted 2003-10-09 07:47 PM


"        With touches of last wave reflected sun
Cascading on the curve of your back
Then revealing a half turned smile
Of far off musing
                              Content perhaps
To ponder the ending day."

Tell JM to move over...
this moth wants her hands
on the screen
as well.

Damn!

~Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile~

Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

9 posted 2003-10-09 09:48 PM


Damn, do I understand this...
Almost made me swallow, hard...but I caught myself.  I'm so good at that.  

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
10 posted 2003-10-09 09:54 PM


you leave me speechless each time, if this is a bar trick, can I start a tab? WOW hon...hugsss you
Lauren~

There's a song inside  my soul
One that I've tried to write over and over again

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

11 posted 2004-04-20 04:13 PM


Oh yesssssss... this one..........

bar trick huh? ... OK...
Bartender...another round please.

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