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Open Poetry #29
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Jason Lyle
Senior Member
since 2003-02-07
Posts 1438
With my darkling

0 posted 2003-09-30 01:06 AM


I see through the eyes of a glass swan
the shattered dreams
of a thousand lost gods
The empty eyes of a dying child,
as he watches the world die behind him.
The hate in a killer
lost in the innocence
of a child's prayer
An obscene light
in the infinite darkness
final release
through the dreams
of a madman
.
.
.
don't ask, this was sent to me by a good friend, I wrote it as a kid 16 years ago, I had forgotten it but she saved it.God only knows what I meant with this one.But hey, this was me, at 16  

Jason

[This message has been edited by Jason Lyle (10-01-2003 03:28 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Jason Lyle - All Rights Reserved
vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
1 posted 2003-09-30 01:10 AM



Well I, for one, am very glad she saved it for you.
Even at 16, your talent shined.  

This is excellent, Jason.  I love it.

Hugs,
~Vicky

When the power of love overcomes the
love of power the world will know peace.
-Jimi Hendrix

n2dmystic
Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 253
beyond the doors of perception
2 posted 2003-09-30 01:45 AM


I think it speaks to the dyadic nature of life.  with-in each line there is a juxtaposition of thought - i.e.:
"see through the eyes of a glass swan"
"shattered dreams of...gods"
"empty eyes...as he watches "
wonderful, and more

Peace, Joe
in the big MT
seeking the serendipitous magical mysteries of life's ubiquitous twisteries

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
3 posted 2003-10-01 09:56 AM


ooh Jason
TG for your friend
and for you . . .

This is how I FELT at 16

The empty eyes of a dying child,
as he watches the world die behind him

Beautiful lines, m'friend
xxoo

SharaRose
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~
4 posted 2003-10-01 10:48 AM


WOW......ahem...Wow...kind of hard to find the words, but stunning comes to mind first. WOW..sorry I keep saying that but what compassion you showed at 16 when that's the most tumultuous time in life. Not an adult, but sure as heck feeling like one, but yet still not being given the voice of an adult all the same. Not to mention finding all the feelings of the opposite sex, and dealing with attitudes of those *teachers* that just didn't understand. Like a hodgepodge or a potpourri of emotions and not really knowing where to place them all...like I said WOW!
Love,
Terri~

Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer!

Gina Culliney
Member
since 2003-03-08
Posts 170

5 posted 2003-10-14 12:02 PM


That was then and this is now, but the talent still remains.
pandonov
Member
since 2003-10-03
Posts 478
b/w conscience and insolence
6 posted 2003-10-14 12:57 PM


years don't change eternity, very nice one
Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
7 posted 2003-10-14 02:32 AM


this was very good, the imagery really came through, sometimes it's hard to see through the eyes of another.
garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
8 posted 2003-10-14 05:33 AM


Goodness, Jason!! You were a very rare talent even 16 years ago, at 16 years of age!! I'm really glad that your friend kept it for you, so that you could share it with us. Thank you, poet Sir.  
Hugs  
Ethel

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
9 posted 2003-10-14 07:41 AM


You wrote this at 16? Brilliant writing then and now Jason
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