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Open Poetry #29
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Kaoru
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Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow

0 posted 2003-09-28 12:15 PM



A sheer
silk maze of smoke.
Glance forward,
see not behind.
Cradle life
as deformed child.
Shoes slipping
on wet grass..
Melodic bruising,
this too, shall pass.

Must we fear our future,
for this is what it's come to be.

A polluted ocean of
fabrications, false
childhood stories.

A penny in the well, the soft sound
of metal against stone..
Merely the screams of drowning wishes,
begging to be unbound and
not decieve.

Fiction, this wind,
that bends a tiny reed.

This star that grants nothing..


© Copyright 2003 Meghan Armitage - All Rights Reserved
charm
Junior Member
since 2003-09-28
Posts 13

1 posted 2003-09-28 12:16 PM


This is very good
1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
2 posted 2003-09-28 12:19 PM


i am the BIGGEST fan of yours...not one line here i don't love...h
Miah
Senior Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 1062
Pennsylvania
3 posted 2003-09-28 12:46 PM


"A penny in the well, the soft sound
of metal against stone..
Merely the screams of drowning wishes,
begging to be unbound and
not decieve."

Another wonderful read, you never fail me.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
4 posted 2003-09-28 03:44 AM


awesome write!
gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
5 posted 2003-09-28 11:20 AM


A sheer
silk maze of smoke.
Glance forward,
see not behind.
Cradle life
as deformed child.
Shoes slipping
on wet grass..
Melodic bruising,
this too, shall pass.

I often thought that cigarette smoke rolls like silk unfolding, i do love to watch it, and this reminded me of it.

and the shoes slipping on wet grass, conjures sound, image and emotion in me.

REALLY great write here meg...enjoyed muchos.

~I wanna live, I wanna give, I've been a miner for a heart of gold~  Neil Young

gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
6 posted 2003-09-29 05:14 AM


bump, read it people!



how cute is he? eeeeeeeeeee very!

KoKo
Senior Member
since 2003-02-15
Posts 995
Inside the shadow's shadow
7 posted 2003-09-29 05:20 AM


Beautiful...
ice
Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404
Pennsylvania
8 posted 2003-09-29 05:40 AM


This would almost be surreal if the reality did not show through so brilliantly...
Excellent poetry......ice


bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

9 posted 2003-09-29 05:27 PM


The lies
and the truth
of fairytales
and hope.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

10 posted 2003-09-29 05:50 PM


A penny in the well, the soft sound
of metal against stone..
Merely the screams of drowning wishes,
begging to be unbound and
not decieve.


Loving it!

Maree

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)


Wind
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

11 posted 2003-09-29 05:53 PM


mee......must keep it

And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots!"
-Tool

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