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Open Poetry #29
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LiquidMidnight
Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 50


0 posted 2003-09-25 07:27 PM


Nicole
(Manifestation of Female Form Into Poetic Form)

Enarmored by the innocent tide
Wrapped the form of her body into the form of this verse
And that all of Shakespearean lullaby have since dried
Her sensual empiricism, I do emmerse
She wandered under heavenly eros of the moon
Spinning webs from my discarded desires
But silken sorrow does not purify to bloom
And ink spilled across this canvas must be dramatized to inspire
So let a trickle of piano synergize with her mood
As I may arrange her body atop the cabinet lid
Letting the display classically objectify her poetic form in the nude
For any allegations to romantic enchantment, she has long since hid

© Copyright 2003 LiquidMidnight - All Rights Reserved
IndigoEve
Member
since 2003-01-10
Posts 279
Etched in the illusion of time
1 posted 2003-09-25 07:37 PM


oh..my..thats just-WOW.

For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,
And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.--"Romeo and Juliet"

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
2 posted 2003-09-26 06:14 PM


Enjoyed...James
angelblueyes
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148
Oklahoma
3 posted 2003-09-26 06:18 PM


This would have a hard beat to it if it were me.It would make for a great song and is a teriffic read.
Crystal

Insomniac Cat
Member
since 2003-09-23
Posts 69
The Land of the Dadaists
4 posted 2003-09-26 07:42 PM


Eloquent, I like it! Flows very well.

[This message has been edited by Insomniac Cat (09-26-2003 07:43 PM).]

LiquidMidnight
Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 50

5 posted 2003-09-27 01:00 AM


Thank you for all of the thoughts.

Crystal, thank you for reading into the meter/rythm. It originally started out as a sonnet, but I liked the direction that it went into instead, so I chopped the sonnet idea, and went with what you see here.

Again, thank you for the replies.

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
6 posted 2003-09-27 11:54 AM


Well what I see (and read) is spectacular!  Sometimes it is better to break the form and go with your heart, as you did here, because the end result was simply stunning.  Kudos!

      Carpe' Diem
The Canuck, Sharon  

n2dmystic
Member
since 2003-09-27
Posts 253
beyond the doors of perception
7 posted 2003-09-27 12:00 PM


"Her sensual empiricism, I do emmerse"
I too am an empiricist.  Gotta experience it, yuh know ;-}.  good write.  Peace, Joe

seeking the serendipitous magical mysteries of life's ubiquitous twisteries

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2003-09-27 12:02 PM


Agreeing here with Mysteria...this was great!
Mistletoe Angel
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Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
9 posted 2003-09-27 01:08 PM




(smiles) Awwwwwwww, this is beautiful, sweet friend, I too agree the bes tthing about poetry is you can write from your heart free as can be so I too believe if you don't feel you can express in form, just let it all out the way you want! (big hugggssssss) This is so romantic, sweet friend, I love it, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth
I can see the sun set and I perceive

***Live***

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
10 posted 2003-09-27 01:11 PM


Midnight (adore your name)
Welcome to PIP!
Sorry I missed your entrance
I must say this is indeed
liquid . . .
flowing from the screen . . .
Beautiful imagery and writing
xxoo

Saunni
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777
West Virginia
11 posted 2003-09-27 02:06 PM


Goodness... incredible write!

Sauni:)The Only Time I See The Sun Is When I'm Within That Vanilla Breeze.The Only Time I'm One With The Sun Is When He Shelters Me From The Rain.

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