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Open Poetry #28
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exhale
Senior Member
since 2003-06-13
Posts 646
Alberta,Canada

0 posted 2003-09-03 10:56 PM


cut my chest open
rip my heart out
kill it
i dont need it anymore
i dont need you anymore
you can take it with you
all it does is slow me down
bring me down
i dont need it
or any other emotions
people just use them
use me
i dont need that kinda pain anymore
i need to breathe
to fly
i cant when you knock the wind out me me
my heart crys everytime you walk by
i stop breathing
you need to take my heart away
that way i can never get hurt again...

© Copyright 2003 Chelsea - All Rights Reserved
Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
1 posted 2003-09-03 10:59 PM


exhale, this is a very powerful poem,
The emotions really come out,
Just remember the heart promotes the inspiration, so I would keep it if I were you.

cuda04
Junior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 46
Wisconsin,USA
2 posted 2003-09-03 11:01 PM


I would keep an eye on typos, but the raw emotion is very powerful, keep up the great work!
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