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 angels and parkbenches
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Passions in Poetry

angels and parkbenches

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Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 11-18-2002
Posts 7451
the ass-end of space


0 posted 08-23-2003 05:49 PM       View Profile for Aenimal   Email Aenimal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Aenimal

she smiles
sings herself softly
into the consciousness
of a suit

she smiles
he frowns
making his way
back to metal and concrete

she smiles
pigeons scatter
gathering feathers loose
barefoot in the grass

she smiles
lost
rebuilding wings
© Copyright 2003 raphael giuffrida - All Rights Reserved
Kielo
Senior Member
since 02-11-2002
Posts 1259


1 posted 08-23-2003 05:52 PM       View Profile for Kielo   Email Kielo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kielo

Wow. Just.... wow.... Maybe one day I'll find the strength to imitate this. Until then, and after, I am in awe of your talent.

Kielo
Nightshade
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 08-31-2001
Posts 14673
just out of reach


2 posted 08-23-2003 05:55 PM       View Profile for Nightshade   Email Nightshade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nightshade's Home Page   View IP for Nightshade

Double Wow!! Love this. Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul ~
            Emily Dickinson




    

Ceinwyn
Member Elite
since 07-09-2000
Posts 2238
Baltimore, MD


3 posted 08-23-2003 06:05 PM       View Profile for Ceinwyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ceinwyn



oh god Raph I love this...like you have said many a time..if my tear ducts were working they'd be flowing like niagara falls ..

If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 08-04-99
Posts 10270


4 posted 08-23-2003 06:08 PM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

she smiles
lost
rebuilding wings


Love this image m'friend. Another fine write from you Sir Raph.



M

ps. I'm keeping it.

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)

Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 06-07-2003
Posts 3888
where the wild flowers grow


5 posted 08-23-2003 07:45 PM       View Profile for Kaoru   Email Kaoru   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kaoru

Beautiful, Raph..
Gina Culliney
Member
since 03-08-2003
Posts 173


6 posted 08-23-2003 07:53 PM       View Profile for Gina Culliney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Gina Culliney

Well penned with grace and beauty.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


7 posted 08-23-2003 07:56 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Raph...it's not often
we get this kind of write
from you...
and on you, it looks good...

do it again?  
Ratleader
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 01-23-2003
Posts 7179
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass


8 posted 08-23-2003 09:55 PM       View Profile for Ratleader   Email Ratleader   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Ratleader's Home Page   View IP for Ratleader

I've been that guy -- I repent!

Nice counterpoint, Raph...you are the champeen of this kind of thing.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>   ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº>  ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº>    ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 11-19-2002
Posts 7522
Ohio


9 posted 08-23-2003 10:01 PM       View Profile for inkedgoddess   Email inkedgoddess   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for inkedgoddess

very forlorn and tender,
im seeing pidgeons lately myself
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 12-26-1999
Posts 5512
Ontario, CANADA


10 posted 08-23-2003 10:04 PM       View Profile for Honeybee   Email Honeybee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Honeybee

I agree with Karilea, I really like this style from you.  Time and time again your strength of a writer shines in all themes/styles.  You blended a common angel theme with a unique theme and as always this poem is perfectly consise with power. Damn when I grow up I want to write just like you

I'm saving this, it's one of your best.....then again I'm biased I think that everything you write is da bomb!

Melissa~

Intellectually I know that Canada is no better than any other country. Emotionally I KNOW that Canada is the best country in the world!

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


11 posted 08-23-2003 10:16 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Nice to see this tender part of  you, Aenimal...sort of melted me.
Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 11-18-2002
Posts 7451
the ass-end of space


12 posted 08-24-2003 01:22 AM       View Profile for Aenimal   Email Aenimal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aenimal

ironically its the tender part that you don't see that gets me sad/angry enough to see the dark part you do see..thanks to all for the kind words
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 03-02-2003
Posts 9998
New York


13 posted 08-24-2003 08:57 AM       View Profile for littlewing   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for littlewing

ahhh . . . but why must you leave this beautiful image Raph?
Left me feeling safe there for a sec
*smile*

I adore these lines:

sings herself softly
into the consciousness
of a suit

Very nice to see you again
xxoo
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 08-04-99
Posts 10270


14 posted 06-25-2005 05:56 AM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

I wish i could write like this...sigh

Bello

mxx

Oh, you speak to me in riddles
and you speak to me in rhymes
My body aches to breathe your breath
Your words keep me alive
~Sarah McLachlan~

 
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