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Open Poetry #28

She Can No Longer Fly

DarkPoetess
New Member

since 2003-08-18

Posts 9
PA, USA

0 posted 2003-08-21 01:50 PM

She Can No Longer Fly

A hand held for an eternity,
Two souls lost in the bliss of the moment,
Soaring together in eachs eyes,
Longing to be entwined for all time,
Yet they can only be one for now,
Hanging in the balance of meantime,
They must leave each other's lusting lips,
Mournfully they separate, crying,
To be forever divided in death's final grasp,
Two lovers forever unified, though separate,
One is left in her loneliness,
Carrying the burdens of both,
And until true love returns to bear them with her,
She can no longer fly.

~Dark Poetess

DarkPoetess
New Member

since 2003-08-18

Posts 9
PA, USA

1 posted 2003-08-21 02:22 PM

Please reply to my poem. I also have one in Teen Poetry, Points of View and Two in Dark Poetry called The Dager and In the Night. Please read them and tell me what you think.

~dark poetess~

Janette

Member Elite

since 2001-07-20

Posts 2843
Chicagoland for now

2 posted 2003-08-21 11:37 PM

"Two lovers forever unified, though separate,
One is left in her loneliness,
Carrying the burdens of both,"

A very poignant and deeply affecting write.

Welcome to Passions!

always seeking joy, adventure and romance and wishing you find the same

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

3 posted 2003-08-22 01:38 PM

Emily, this is indeed a bitteresweet write
reminded me much of Romeo and Juliet which I adore . . . as I do this

Sometimes the boards get crazy and poems get rampled . . . maty be a few days sometimes before you see responses and then two weeks later your poem is still here.
Everyone replies at different times.

This is well written and I loved it
xxoo

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

4 posted 2003-08-22 01:40 PM

Very nicely written...much enjoyed.
~Hugs~

~The breeze that kissed you on the face,
Has held me in the same embrace~

angelblueyes
Member Elite

since 2003-07-19

Posts 2148
Oklahoma

5 posted 2003-08-22 01:42 PM

This is a bittersweet write.You can feel the despair and the hope in this.Nicely done from within.
Crystal

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