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Passions in Poetry

Some Kind Of Madness (Serenity's People Watching Challenge)

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Mysteria
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0 posted 08-19-2003 02:38 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Mysteria



This is indeed about a very real person, and is for Serenity's people watching poetry challenge.  
It is just sad there are so many victims of this disease who don't get a poem.  Ben got moved from regular care to restrained care over the weekend, so sad, so very sad when this happens.

             


Some Kind Of Madness

Today was a new day, a new place,
And I was so nervous for the first time.
I loved this man, and knew in my heart
This change would be his sentence to death.

His, shellacked, and life-cracked skin
Appeared to form somewhat of a grin.
As one bony finger, so long ago useful
Trembled its way up the wall to find it.

So many levels of history on that wall.
His life lined that sterile surface like an old quilt.
Scenes of picnics, family portraits, ships,
Now so dusty and faded with time hung there.

We watched as some recollection now took him,
Reflections of his joy long past now seen clearly
In the face of the photo he looked at.
I swore he smiled, if only for only an instant.

His daughter whispered, as if he could not hear,
“Once his memory shone as the stars in heaven,
His stories filled our hearts with such love.
Oh how we so miss the days of his youth repeated.”

I said, “Well why not share them with him now?
Take him there once more in bits and pieces.”
She didn’t understand, and said,
“I do all I can do to just visit him.”
I had heard this so many times before.

Today, in disinfected, striped pajamas,
His slippers on wrong feet,
He perused his new surroundings
Then…he reached the bars on the window
And his head dropped into his hands in a sob.

His daughter swiftly knelt at his feet
But Ben’s head would not rise up
I knew in my heart, How could it?
They'd finally taken the last thing he owned.

Ben usually walked out into the night
Not knowing where he was going or why really.
Some followed him in search of
What no one knows, but they went anyway.

There are some that say
Each night he remembered her face.
What was construed as some kind of madness
Was really Ben, and his wife of 60 years,
Dancing on the lawn under the moonlight.

Tonight he sits in front of that window,
Knowing in his fractured mind,
He will never leave that room, but,
Perhaps she will find him tonight?

Each time I cut his hair, I tell him stories.
Antics of my granddaughters, the cat, the news.
Today, there was not one single story in me,
I was too filled with sorrow and anger,
At some kind of madness.

For Ben




Sure, I wear rose-colored glasses, makes everything just rosey. Carpe' Diem        

[This message has been edited by Mysteria (08-19-2003 06:54 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Mysteria 1997 - All Rights Reserved
Wind
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1 posted 08-19-2003 02:42 PM       View Profile for Wind   Email Wind   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Wind

seriously, such a heartwrenching story. I must keep it

insanity is not a crime

Mysteria
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2 posted 08-19-2003 02:47 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Karen asked for a character study of sorts on another human being, and I thought of Ben whose hair I cut on Monday. I volunteer with seniors in long term cair.  He unfortunately got moved from "normal" care in the the rest home, to "secured", and yes, it is terribly sad, and true.  There is an entire floor of those long gone into their own worlds.  Wind, thank you so much for the kind words.

[This message has been edited by Mysteria (08-19-2003 03:01 PM).]

serenity blaze
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3 posted 08-19-2003 03:03 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Sharon this is solid gold, and your heart is a treasure my friend.

"So many levels of history on that wall."

Sad, and beautiful, you have portrayed Ben with the grace and dignity that he deserves.

I'm speechless, here.

I'm keeping this.

(I'm keeping YOU, too. )
Sunshine
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4 posted 08-19-2003 03:05 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Give me the whole box, dear...
the whole damned box.

I only wish Ben
could see this, just once.

Bless you.
garysgirl
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5 posted 08-19-2003 03:12 PM       View Profile for garysgirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit garysgirl's Home Page   View IP for garysgirl

Sharon, I love you, Lady. This story shows your kindness and your compassion in your heart.

A quartet that I used to sing with visited the nursing home a lot to sing for the patients. This brought back a lot of the memories from there. I always cried after I left from there. I tried to  keep a smile on my face for them...if I could.

Thanks for the kleenex...I need them....

Hugs to you and Ben  
Ethel

[This message has been edited by garysgirl (08-19-2003 03:14 PM).]

Enchantress
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6 posted 08-19-2003 03:57 PM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

...

What Karilea said...
and pass the kleenex please.
~Tight hugs dear poetess~

~The breeze that kissed you on the face,
    Has held me in the same embrace~

Mysteria
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7 posted 08-19-2003 04:10 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Karen you better keep me you are stuck with me What a way to enter your challenge, will try to find a happier person this week how's that?

Ethel, you are a treasure you know that?

Karilea, and Enchantress, I tried to put the kleenix there as it is not so happy is it, but sometimes the truth never is.  Thank you both so much.
Dark Angel
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8 posted 08-19-2003 05:27 PM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

I wish Ben could see this too. This is beautifully heartwrenching Sharon.

Sighhh, I have no words.

Maree.

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)

Poet deVine
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9 posted 08-19-2003 06:47 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

I think you should ask if you can post it at the senior facility. Maybe family members will get something out of it before their parents/grandparents get to Ben's floor.

Well done..and with such heart. Who can keep the tears back with this one. Certainly not I.
Mysteria
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10 posted 08-19-2003 06:57 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Maree thank you kindly, yours was awesome!

Sharon, every time I write of someone at Evergreen I do ask permission, and they go into a book in the sitting room for all to read, with other books done by the residents themselves, but I thank you for the suggestion.  I have written about many patients there, but in all honestly, nothing changes, nothing!
Martie
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11 posted 08-19-2003 07:24 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Sharon

Amazing tug of heart here, and this view of Ben with your words, shows the beauty and grandeur of yours.
Nightshade
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just out of reach


12 posted 08-19-2003 07:44 PM       View Profile for Nightshade   Email Nightshade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nightshade's Home Page   View IP for Nightshade

Sharon, I had to stop reading in the middle of this as I couldn't see through tears. Beautiful dear lady..beautiful. Chris

"Hope" is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul ~
            Emily Dickinson




    

Mysteria
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13 posted 08-20-2003 01:30 AM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Martie, even the coldest heart would warm around these people, trust me.

Chris, sorry - you are not the only one who cried believe me, I couldn't stop for a long time.  Thanks for reading this.
BluesSerenade
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14 posted 08-21-2003 01:34 PM       View Profile for BluesSerenade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for BluesSerenade

The love and beauty in your words are endless Sharon.  

However sad this was to read, you warmed my heart in a special way.

Thank you for sharing all sides of humanity here.   Many hugs for you~
Ringo
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15 posted 08-21-2003 05:54 PM       View Profile for Ringo   Email Ringo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ringo

Your love and sadness make this a truly beautifull write. He was lucky to have you in his life.

We are all equal but we’re individually different
and able to reach the impossible if we try.

littlewing
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16 posted 08-21-2003 06:49 PM       View Profile for littlewing   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for littlewing

Sharon, this is heartwrenching . . .
Bless your sweet soul for being by his side.  I do understand this, being in the medical field . . .
saw many people who were uncared for
and often someone like me, during a
routine visit . . . they would sit and tell
me of their lives and I would smile and laugh and ask questions.  I do miss that

This made me smile though because it reminded me of my uncle:

His slippers on wrong feet,

I have seen this so much and I smiled
so thank you
Beautiful write from a pure soul
Ben will be as good as he can with you by his side . . .
xxoo  
Mysteria
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17 posted 08-22-2003 03:32 AM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

It is wonderful to see comments from people who understand the plight of seniors, especially those somewhat disabled.  To have empathy for them is so easy, but to overcome that and treat them like they were before their change is the hard part, as I witness time and time again with their families  Thank you so very kindly for reading this one, it is special to me.
latearrival
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18 posted 06-26-2005 12:35 AM       View Profile for latearrival   Email latearrival   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for latearrival

Just read this and found it so beautiful and sad. Families do have a hard time caring for parents or other family members in this situation.I used to care for a few elderly and remember well. Two lived in our court. I thought it would be wonderful if the two daughters just exchanged mothers. That way each could give the best care. I found it easy to listen to the stories and go along with whatever they told me. But the daughters had a hard time because the mothers were treating them like strangers and it was hard for them. I also saw many in homes who were neglected and the family said, "well it is too hard to go and see them this way". So sad.Thinking of themselves again.....
Mysteria
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19 posted 03-25-2006 12:43 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

I hope you don't mind me bumping my own poem, as I know that is just so rude but I wanted to get it handy for this man's daughter to find.  That tough old bird Ben  stayed there in that ward until 5:00 p.m. yesterday, where I was told he died peacefullly with a smile on his face.  I like to think he and his wife finally found each other.

What a devastating disease this is, the worst for the elderly that I have ever seen anyway.  So hard on the family as a whole.  Thank you, and to Linda, God bless you all in your time of loss.
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