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Open Poetry #28
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Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2003-08-12 03:47 PM



At sunset,
The moiré surface
Reflected sun dreams
On ripples spread
While I sat
Knowing
Words could never
Be unsaid

Sometimes
The view from here
Paints Monet on mind
While others
Picasso angles the
Side of me that lies blind

Un-whisper
Those undercurrents
You felt lies
While I drift

On mirrored
Early autumn sky

Come winter
The lake will freeze

Where then
Will the pages turn?

© Copyright 2003 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Poe_Pot_Pie
Member
since 2003-06-01
Posts 107
Canada
1 posted 2003-08-12 04:06 PM


nice metaphors. keep it up!
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2003-08-12 04:07 PM



...

where then
will the pages
turn?

...

amid the gray of
flanneled sky
as purple twilight
rims the edge
before the snow
peeks over ledge
in my chambers,
attic high...

here is where pages
are turned
awaiting, again,
autumn's burn...

~*~

Now stay around for a little longer, will ya?

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2003-08-12 04:13 PM


"Sometimes
The view from here
Paints Monet on mind
While others
Picasso angles the
Side of me that lies blind"

~ Artistically expressed!


EA

Robert Frazier
Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014

4 posted 2003-08-12 04:17 PM


a whisper of regret screams from beneath the canvas of your poetry...you are a true artist!

Rf

[This message has been edited by Robert Frazier (08-12-2003 04:17 PM).]

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

5 posted 2003-08-12 04:46 PM


Sometimes
The view from here
Paints Monet on mind
While others
Picasso angles the
Side of me that lies blind


Oh my this is really very beautiful. It's always a pleasure to read you Cpat

Maree

fate is not just
whose cooking  smells good
but which way the wind blows

(Ani DiFranco)


Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
6 posted 2003-08-12 05:04 PM


While I sat
Knowing
Words could never
Be unsaid

Your words should never remain unsaid!  Now you see, you haven't been around too much lately...so, my children forgot the meaning of "I am reading CPAT." When all is quiet tonight, I will come back to you.

Just perfect, Ron.

See you later,
Patricia

Kaoru
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Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow
7 posted 2003-08-12 05:12 PM


Beautiful write..


angelblueyes
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2148
Oklahoma
8 posted 2003-08-12 05:15 PM


The metaphors in this are enjoyed.You shine with the artistry of your write
angelblueyes

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

9 posted 2003-08-12 06:23 PM


Thanks everyone..for the comments and taking time to read my scribbles... as Southern has said in comments..the WurkMonster... is indeed devouring my time and energies of late  and I am so absent from commenting I feel guilty posting anything. So... thank you all for the generous replies and comments when I am so unable to return the favor...

Now...lol.. it is back into the jaws of the Wurkbeast for me... it seems everyday of late has added to the demands and I fear my dropping in is going to continue to be quite limited for some time...

ah well... keeps me off the streets... lol


Duncan
Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455

10 posted 2003-08-12 06:53 PM


"Un-whisper
Those undercurrents
You felt lies
While I drift

On mirrored
Early autumn sky

Come winter
The lake will freeze

Where then
Will the pages turn?"

Ya know the saying, "Leave 'em wanting more"?  You always do...
What ya say we both quit the day jobs, go have a beer and be slackers awhile?  

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
11 posted 2003-08-12 08:14 PM


Ron -- this one's true to your style with an added subtle and imbedded rhyming scheme which flavors the write ever so well.  Perpetually admiring your artistry...

-MVS

You CAN make a difference:
http://educate-yourself.org/

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350
the ass-end of space
12 posted 2003-08-12 08:33 PM


Damn nice to see you writing again
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

13 posted 2003-08-12 09:09 PM




I think I'm just gonna curl up in THIS thread for awhile...

Miss you.

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
14 posted 2003-08-12 09:23 PM


Great write Ron...
There was a tone to this piece that reminded me of twilight...calm soul searching. Nice. TD

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
15 posted 2003-08-13 09:36 AM


While I sat
Knowing
Words could never
Be unsaid

I love the contemplation here... both within the poem... and what it inspires in the reader. *S*

Don't ever feel guilty about posting, Cap'n... else I'll start nagging YOU! LOL

Good luck finding breathing time... you are missed! *S*

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
16 posted 2003-08-13 09:38 AM


Ron,

you leave much to the imagination here

The view from here
Paints Monet on mind
While others
Picasso angles the
Side of me that lies blind

the side that lies blind . . .
brilliant
xxoo

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
17 posted 2003-08-13 09:46 AM


Ron,

Read this one last night and didn't get a chance to respond..

"Sometimes
The view from here
Paints Monet on mind
While others
Picasso angles the
Side of me that lies blind"

"Un-whisper
Those undercurrents
You felt lies
While I drift"

I loved those lines...Monet; soothing, almost surreal.   Picasso; abstract, yet still holds beauty in the unsure.  Un-whisper..hmmm..I loved the entire piece.

Susan

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
18 posted 2003-08-15 12:03 PM


Sometimes
The view from here
Paints Monet on mind

Cpat, you bring color to life, and paint it bold!

So nicely~



Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
19 posted 2003-08-15 03:26 PM


Ron...it's always a pleasure to read your poetry...so nix the guilt stuff about replies, okay?  Post those poems!
Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
20 posted 2003-08-16 12:10 PM


I am in complete AWE of this, what an amazing talent you really have, you painted your canvas with very vivid images and emotion....hugssss you I keep this one!


Lauren~

The way you move me
I walk with your shadow
With your silhouette
Leave the light on
It always comes
Back to you

garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
21 posted 2003-08-16 12:47 PM


Capt. Ron, you have painted a very
beautiful picture for us here. I
really enjoyed reading this and I'm
going to keep it. I hope you don't mind.
Hugs  
Ethel

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