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1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2003-08-07 09:26 AM

Look Past

if I said
I loved you
would it be
edited words
fallen sheared
in cutting room
floor altered
from meaning
do words
change feelings
unneeded parts
to make
a different story
in a fairy
tale logic
was there color
outside the lines
to reveal
your fears
look past
to see
a plot so thick
where the characters
move from
shadows to
main roles
you know
your lines
stop quitting
in the middle
if you sat
through the whole
thing for once
maybe you
could see
there is no
the end

"I am living a life, i have no wish to live. How did this happen?" Unknown

[This message has been edited by 1slick_lady (08-07-2003 09:58 AM).]

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

1 posted 2003-08-07 10:12 AM

"was there color
outside the lines
to reveal
your fears"

I started highlighting when I saw those lines -- "got to tell her how true this is, and how sometimes MOST of the color is outside the lines....."

...but then I just kept reading/highlighting all the way to the end....so I'll just say it's all good, my friend, and all so true.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Snowflake From Hell
Senior Member

since 2003-07-10

Posts 777
My own little Icey Oblivion

2 posted 2003-08-07 11:30 AM

wow, this was great

I feel rain pouring down. I wait to rot away,
Live again, here forever, the spiral never ends. Godsmack

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

3 posted 2003-08-07 11:36 AM

good job slippery one...

Wind

Member Elite

since 2002-10-12

Posts 2981

4 posted 2003-08-07 11:37 AM

genius. just perfectly executed and expressed

insanity is not a crime

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

5 posted 2003-08-07 11:47 AM

nice read

NewEnglandlazurlu
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-01-04

Posts 7470
A Mountain Paradise

6 posted 2003-08-07 11:52 AM

was there color
outside the lines
to reveal
your fears

This is a line in and of itself that says volumes. I may not always respond, but I always read your words. You are an exceptional poet.

Marti

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