navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #28 » take me over
Open Poetry #28
Post A Reply Post New Topic take me over Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain

0 posted 2003-08-02 10:12 PM


quietly tears pour down my blackened wall
from my magic markers
i kissed the mirror with a chance
left it without everything i was
many times your eyes were there
baring into the soul i let you
see to early when you said i would get hurt

now you see the water down my wall
stained with all my regrets

the last one is you


* the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes *

[This message has been edited by Riley (08-02-2003 10:13 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Riley Grant - All Rights Reserved
Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892
where the wild flowers grow
1 posted 2003-08-02 10:44 PM


Wow, this is fantastic!
garysgirl
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
2 posted 2003-08-02 10:50 PM


Yes, Riley, this is an amazing write.
Very good.
Hugs  
Ethel

SharaRose
Member Elite
since 2003-07-19
Posts 2501
Somewhere out there~
3 posted 2003-08-02 10:56 PM




SharaRose @-->--

Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer!

Wind
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-10-12
Posts 2981

4 posted 2003-08-03 11:14 AM


wow Ri...that was really good.

I hate the repedativeness of my stinkin replys but..yanno

insanity is not a crime

Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
5 posted 2003-08-03 11:27 AM


kaoru- thanks for replying, i tried...

garysgirl- thanks a lot for the hug and reply

shararose- thanks a lot

wind- its not like it's our fault we can't think of nuthing else to say



riley

* the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes *

Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

6 posted 2003-08-03 11:39 AM


beautiful...
Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
7 posted 2003-08-03 11:40 AM


kahlil- thank you so much

* the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes *

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2003-08-03 11:40 AM


i kissed the mirror with a chance
left it without everything i was
many times your eyes were there
baring into the soul i let you
see to early when you said i would get hurt


now you see the water down my wall
stained with all my regrets


the last one is you

==========================


this is such a cool poem...surreal and abstract at the same time...and the emotions are expressed with a haunting regret.


i kissed the mirror with a chance
left it without everything i was


love those lines...
and the closing ones.

very cool poetess Riley.

"How could I stand here with you and not be moved by you."

LH

Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
9 posted 2003-08-03 11:42 AM


janet marie- thank you for replying......i tried...writer's block to overcome....just a spur of the moment idea...thanks again


riley

* the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes *

gemjop
Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA
10 posted 2003-08-03 07:38 PM


Riley..my god..what an image..this is stunning. and chilling too.

Knowing this so well.

Into my library..

just, wow.



gem
xxxx

Instant karma's gonna get you.

Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
11 posted 2003-08-03 08:19 PM


tankie tankie gem

* the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes *

Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
12 posted 2003-08-03 08:35 PM


I could definitely see my own reflection in the mirror of your words...

Excellent write!

Patricia

eor
Senior Member
since 2002-09-26
Posts 959
blues & greys
13 posted 2003-08-03 08:42 PM


beautiful write...(adding this to library!)

"in a past life i was a woodcarver's knife: the sharpend blade of a wood cutter, the eldest son of the chief's brother: a maker of drums"

Riley
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 1038
in the pouring rain
14 posted 2003-08-03 09:27 PM


patricia- thank you for taking the time to reply.....much appreciated


eor- thanks, and glad you liked it

riley

* the pouring rain kisses my lips with innocence as you look into my eyes *

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
15 posted 2003-08-26 04:45 AM



"i kissed the mirror with a chance
left it without everything i was
many times your eyes were there
baring into the soul i let you
see to early when you said i would get hurt


now you see the water down my wall
stained with all my regrets


the last one is you"


Wow...Riley...this is an awesome write!
VERY cool...one of my favorites of yours.
Keep 'em comin'.
Hugs,
~Vicky

"My friends are my estate."
~Emily Dickinson

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
16 posted 2003-08-26 05:29 AM


damn

love that ending

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #28 » take me over

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary