Kiss Of Death (Dream duet with Wranx)

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Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

0 posted 2003-07-20 02:16 AM

Kiss Of Death (Dream duet with Wranx)

If you were to look at him
really look
you would find a man
cut from a cloth
somewhat on the bias
and decidedly threadbare.

But, glance away and you'll see it
that glinting glimmer
emanating from his eyes
the dark shining that is her

that is her howling
that drives his nails
into his palms.

He walks head bowed
to the weight of what was
his hair thrashing the air
banging at it like the tongues of hell.

Poor fellow:

Like a climbing vine
she circled him between
a town and a hamlet
where two streets meet
bearing grapes.

His arms and legs struggle still
within the memory of her twining clasp
robed in her promise
a repentant wearing a hair shirt

he trundles on.

The black winds of remorse snatch and pluck
at his collar with crone-like hands
snapping behind him.

The days come and go

the sun hisses
the moon glares

even the weeds wrap around his ankles
dragging him down into the folds of his skin
unremembered.

Poor fellow:

But, he remembers

her, of the smoky eyes and burning mouth
her porcelain heart of feverish needs.

How her white face
a slow migration of so much talk
a conviction hanging triangular
like a coat-hanger
would smooth the sour hope
and the blur of things.

How he found within her willow limbs
a sinuous swaying of narcotic dream
a drowning in which he lost his will.

And how it all ended
the deed that undid him
on that descending day

when fate got unlucky
and he was taken by shadows.

That usher him now
up those thirteen rough boards

to the thirteen foot dais
and the thirteen inch blade

of the Halifax Gibbet.

To be continued……

[This message has been edited by Dark Angel (07-20-2003 02:19 AM).]

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

1 posted 2003-07-20 02:29 AM

her, of the smoky eyes and burning mouth
her porcelain heart of feverish needs.

In complete awe, these duets are killing me I'm completely intimidated now lol. I can't think of anything to say other than i adore this through and through.

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

2 posted 2003-07-20 03:00 AM

I knew it would be good, but never expected something THIS PERFECT! I'm so glad you guys wrote together. I knew there was a 'sinq' going on there...

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-25

Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...

3 posted 2003-07-20 03:24 AM

WOW! This is amazing; and I, too, am in awe.

You two make an incredible team, and I can't wait
to read what's coming next!

Hugs to you both...

"it is better to be a part of beauty
for one instant and then cease to
exist than to exist forever
and never be a part of beauty"
-- Don Marquis

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

4 posted 2003-07-20 03:49 AM

What an intricate and finely woven write.
Kethry

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

5 posted 2003-07-20 03:53 AM

Ed and Maree:

What beauty has been set before me . . .

a conviction hanging triangular
like a coat-hanger

heheh . . . brilliant
Never would have thought to use that description

so the cause of death is indeed a SHE?
metaphorically speaking

The both of you amaze me and I am so happy that this writing occurred . . .

waiting on the continuation . . .
xxoo

[This message has been edited by littlewing (07-20-2003 03:55 AM).]

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

6 posted 2003-07-20 08:11 AM

The term "seamless" has been applied lately to duet bondings...I'm proud to think that I could not dissect who wrote what...the mind blendings were wonderful, and I am eager to see Part II!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

7 posted 2003-07-20 08:23 AM

Dark Angel & Wranx,
A field of symbols that flowered. Loved the walk.

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

8 posted 2003-07-20 09:55 AM

Thank you friends, for having the patience to read this through. It was taking on a life of its own.

Sharon, very happy that you like it. Maree and I kinda like this one too.

Don't be too eager for the next. It seems neither one of us do things quickly.

Ed

[This message has been edited by wranx (07-20-2003 10:00 AM).]

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

9 posted 2003-07-20 04:45 PM

Hi poet friends, thank you for stopping by and having a read of what Ed and I came up with.... I can surely say it was so much fun and a great pleasure writing with Ed.

Sharon, thank you for bringing us together.

Ed, you definately are a dream duet partner, I had a wonderful and fun time writing with you and I can't wait to get started on part 2. Thank you m'friend.

Thank you all for your kind and lovely replies.

Maree

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

10 posted 2003-07-20 08:14 PM

Ed and Maree...A fabulous poem...so well done!!

brian sites
Senior Member

since 2002-06-25

Posts 1475
usa

11 posted 2003-07-21 12:17 PM

a great duet

one of the best

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

12 posted 2003-07-21 06:20 AM

Fine wine is worth the wait.

My my my...

to be continued?

Yes indeed.

If not, I'll chew the cork.

Simply, and yet, not inticately, a beautiful portrait of living loss--you took heartache and painted it man.

Poor fellow?

M'lord and lady Duchie, I beg you both to fill this empty glass.

You made me feel winter, in July, in New ORlEANS, TOO.

damn. shaking my head.

This is so, so...sigh.

THIS IS.

I would toss roses, but you'll have to settle for the petals, I do believe I chewed the stem...

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

13 posted 2003-07-21 09:25 AM

Simply awesome! Can't wait for part two! I loved every word of this. Bravo! Chris

"At one glance
I love you
With a thousand hearts."

— Mihri Hatun, Turkish poet

peppermint35
Senior Member

since 2000-05-28

Posts 1106
Texas, USA

14 posted 2003-07-21 09:26 AM

W-O-W!!!

Pepper
"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

15 posted 2003-07-21 09:35 AM

enjoyed this duet much

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

16 posted 2003-07-21 11:31 AM

Bravo! I think perhaps... the best duet I have ever read....

now...lol.. I wish I had written so much of this...

PKreturns
Member

since 2003-07-21

Posts 362
New Orleans, LA

17 posted 2003-07-21 01:08 PM

Amazing. The title pulled me in and the poem itself is so full of symbolism.

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

18 posted 2003-07-21 03:06 PM

Wow! This was poetry. I can't wait for the next...

Susan C.

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

19 posted 2003-07-22 09:07 AM

Thanks again everyone. The replies have been wonderful.

Ed

"You shouldn't be surprised at what happens next"

Janette

Member Elite

since 2001-07-20

Posts 2843
Chicagoland for now

20 posted 2003-07-23 09:04 AM

This is an amazing read ... BRAVO ... to you both.

Enjoyed this one and look forward to the next.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

21 posted 2003-07-23 12:08 PM

"to be continued"--very welcomed words to read!!!

Kudos two times over!

Warm appreciative hugs to you both!!! Outstanding collaboration!!!

EA

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

22 posted 2003-07-29 01:20 AM

Two of our best and most creative -- Dream Duet indeed!

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

garysgirl

Member Laureate

since 2002-09-29

Posts 19237
Florida, USA

23 posted 2003-07-29 01:44 AM

A wonderful write from two very wonderful people. This certainly was a dream duet. I look forward to the second part.

Hugs to you both

Ethel

El_Campeador
Senior Member

since 2003-01-29

Posts 761
Ohio, USA

24 posted 2003-07-29 07:30 AM

You two did a really good job together...

“We are all travelers in the wilderness of this world, and the best that we can find in our travels is an honest friend.” –Robert Louis Stevenson

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

25 posted 2003-07-29 10:21 AM

Stunning work! *S* This is indeed a dream duet... please don't make us wait TOO long for the continuation! *S*

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

26 posted 2003-08-02 04:21 AM

Talk about chemistry in poetry, I think we have the best ellixer there could be here, and can't tell you how impressed I am with this duet. You are certainly meant to write together that is evident. Bravo!

Ceinwyn
Member Elite

since 2000-07-09

Posts 2175
VA

27 posted 2003-08-02 10:06 PM

*jaw drops* after reading this I don't think I even belong here

If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried.

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