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Open Poetry #27
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Doug Pretorius
Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 81
Ontario, Canada

0 posted 2003-07-15 05:02 PM


Withering Whispers
July 15, 2003
Copyright 2003 Doug Pretorius

Where whispers wither to and fro,
in summer's breezes and moonless night,
I hold a distant dreaming thought,
a candle there shares its sight.
Today sows what torrents of light,
carried on wings of sorrow,
that breathe more deeply,
the harvested winds of tomorrows.
And in that what bitterness follows,
to weave in and out of delicate love,
only to fall victim to the frostbitten land,
of our hopes dashed from above.


[This message has been edited by Doug Pretorius (07-16-2003 08:58 AM).]

© Copyright 2003 Doug Pretorius - All Rights Reserved
Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

1 posted 2003-07-15 11:18 PM


Withering Whispers, Seasons of Love
Joys and Pains, Ups and Downs
I like how you wove this all together...

Tim
Senior Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 1794

2 posted 2003-07-16 12:08 PM


tis a fine poem you have written, enjoyed.
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
3 posted 2003-07-16 01:27 AM


Doug, I liked the alliteration and smooth flow of this, it's a bit like a softly whispered dream.

JaiOfHeaven
Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 207
California, Usa
4 posted 2003-07-16 02:31 AM


Touched me. Your style is pleasing and I don't believe there was really any lack of emotion or description. Keep on writing..experiment.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2003-07-16 02:34 AM


lovely write
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