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Open Poetry #27
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Of Mary and a Little Lamb
| Open Poetry #27 |
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Of Mary and a Little Lamb |
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Justin Genius Member
since 2001-04-02
Posts 85 |
Of Mary and a Little Lamb Some say it was our Mary who once stole a little lamb, But I must tell you here and now that story is a scam. For Mary has been known to love a fine and gooey stew And ours only had this lamb because she ate the ewe! Now you may think our Mary is a wolf in sheep's disguise, But I swear Lady Mary never changes at moonrise, And never feels the urge to howl at any kind of Moon, Nor does she ever growl at sheepish people in a room. So why on earth then did she eat the ewe and keep the lamb, Instead of making herring salad covered up with jam? I always loved to find the answers to a mystery, But this time grab a hanky 'cause this tale's a tragedy! ~~~~~ I found her in the kitchen brewing up another dish And simply asked her: "Mary is that ewe or is it fish?" "Oh no," she said, "It’s ONE FLEW OVER, who was flying by, Well, just the part I got my hands on, since I missed his thigh." I checked in with ONE FLEW, still in one piece to my surprise, "My alter ego's all she caught, thank goodness not a slice! The woman chops up everything that moves, the silly cow, And since that's edible I volunteer to make her chow!" Disturbing news from one that once flew over cuckoo's nest, So back to Mary in the kitchen, ready to invest; I said: "Please tell me Mary it's not true about the ewe, You surely could have used a Justin for a gooey stew." "I’m glad you ask me Justin, 'cause I wasn’t thinking stew; To have a ewe drop dead on me was something very new. I saw this lamb, its fleece as white as snow, but surely not The ewe, that looked real dirty - couldn’t clean it with a cloth. So since it was our laundry day, I used the 'Stute's machine; I washed her good and loved to see her swim like a sardine. I took her out the yard into the sun when she was done; To watch her walk around in circles was a lot of fun. We have a fence to keep us in, but how was I to know Doc Moose had set the voltage high - he loves to see us glow In darkness when we break out for a trip to Corner Pub; Instead it turned the ewe to instant roast inside a rug! I know you will agree with me to never waste good roast, So therefore I made stew of her and ate it with French toast. And since I am allergic to just any kind of skin, I’ll let you have the sheepskin to remind me of my sin. Now ever since this happened I've been haunted day and night, By bleating noises in my head, my nerves are real uptight. It makes me chop off everything that moves and make a stew; That lamb keeps bleating in my head: "Eat anything but ewe!" Of course, being the lunatics we are, we changed the song Of Mary and her little lamb; all Justins sang along. We even made the hit parade - came in at number 9, The people recognized the tune and really loved the rhyme! "Our Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb, Our Mary had a little lamb - she used its Mum for stew. Now everywhere that Mary goes, Mary goes, Mary goes, Now everywhere that Mary goes the lamb bleats: "Where’s my ewe?" It followed her back to the 'Stute, to the 'Stute, to the 'Stute, It followed her back to the 'Stute to haunt her night and day. The lamb has claimed exclusive right, on her fright, every night, The lamb has claimed exclusive right and turned her into prey!" At long last some disturbing noises reached my ear one night. 'Twas Mary running down the halls, her eyes were full of fright! She kicked and screamed - grinned sheepishly - she surely lost her mind; To sit back and do nothing would be pleasant, but unkind. Poor Mary's brain was in such pain, so we called Miss Ery, Who gave her some electric shocks, performed lobotomy. We felt so sad when we found Mary lost in-sanity, So off we were to steal the key to Doc his pharmacy. And Justin Toxicated mixed a drink not tried before, Which put her right to sleep! It has been twenty years or more! We call her Sleeping Beauty now and keep her stashed away, But that's a different story I will share another day. Remember Mary and her tale when playing that old tune, Or drink a bloody Mary with a friend in the saloon. Some sheep are black and changing that brings nothing but bad luck, Although I must admit I really love that sheepskin rug! Justin Genius |
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| © Copyright 2003 Justin Genius - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Nurse Crachet Member
since 1999-09-27
Posts 318They know where I am! |
Justin G, I can see you've been using your time with us very creatively. Makes this Nurse even more proud that she has such a wonderful bunch of Justins wandering about the halls. I'll send Doc Moose to give you a check up though since we're not totally sure what might be lurking in that rug.  [This message has been edited by Nurse Crachet (07-08-2003 08:09 AM).] |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Justin, Lovely story, now it's time for lights out. |
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Justin Nuff
Registered
New MemberPosts 1 |
Well now, as I hum this little tune, It makes me smile a bit this day But sort of sad for the lamb and ewe They didn't just up and run away  [This message has been edited by Justin Nuff (07-08-2003 09:22 AM).] |
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Justin Stitches New Member
since 2003-07-08
Posts 1God's Country |
Not sure I want to hear the tale about Sleeping Beauty through the eyes of your pen  LOL, wonderful - just wonderful! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Oh good gosh - who let the 'stuter's out? |
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2dalimit Member Elite
since 2000-02-08
Posts 2228Mississippi coast |
Melton |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
No wonder children have nightmares, especially after JustinBody babysits. This was hilarious. |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
 thanks for the laugh..If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Very entertaining reading! You're just a genius! LOL Love, Life & Laughter, Earth Angel |
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Justin Genius Member
since 2001-04-02
Posts 85 |
Thanks folks! It's been my pleasure to write for you, but even more to read all your kind words. Heck, where did those Justings come from all of a sudden? So KEWL to see the family grow! |
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